Closing Arguments - Illinois

"Emotion is highly overrated in football. My wife Corky is emotional as hell but can't play football worth a damn."
-- Hall of Fame Coach John McKay
I. Case History/Opening Statement
A. Case History
The Fighting Illini have been here before. There was the Rose Bowl in '83. There was the shared Big Ten crown in '90. This century, there was the shocking 2001 league title and even more surprising run to the Rose Bowl in 2007. Unfortunately, the season after three of those four great years, Illinois missed a bowl game. And after the 2001 triumph, the program began a nose dive that has resulted in only one winning season in the past 8 (the aforementioned 2007 team). While the 2008 team seemed a play or two short of being decent, last year's squad appeared rudderless. And now, they may have a coach who has one year to save his job - but may not have the squad to do it.

B. Opening Statement
II. Discovery
A. Pop Music Teaches Us
B. Off Tackle Empire Says
Here's some of what we've written about the Illini over the off-season:
A look back at a very unusual last decade
III. Emotional Plea
I challenge you to define this team. For the past four years, this was Juice Williams's squad. That was a blessing and a curse. The successes and failures of the team almost perfectly mirrored the successes and failures of Juice. Nathan Scheelhaase takes over now. The hope is that leads to more consistent results. Evryone is saying all of the right things for August. The hope is that they're doing the same thing in October. Absent a proven running back and proven wide receiver (which partly explains former starting QB Eddie McGee's move to the position), it may take some time for the offense to get going in new OC Paul Petrino's system. We're all assuming that it will be a pass-happy set. It will be interesting to see how a young quarterback handles that much responsibility that quickly.
On defense, the Illini were poor last year.The good news is that expected leader Martez Wilson should be back to full strength after missing 2009. The bad news is that expected starting strong safety Supo Sanni just found out that his next action will be in 2011, after a rupturing his Achilles tendon. New DC Vic Koenning is charged with building a defense, but it won't be easy. It's reasonable to hope that they'll take a step forward with improved coaching (Koenning did a solid job at K-State). It's hard to know how far that improvement gets them. They have a long way to go from 2009's performance before they can think about challenging in the conference again.
The schedule is kind enough to keep Illinois from having to face Wisconsin and Iowa. However, dates with Penn State, Ohio State, Michigan State, Missouri, and Northwestern all loom as likely losses. Two tricky non-conference games (at Fresno State and vs. Northern Illinois) don't help the team's chances of returning to a bowl game.
IV. The Verdict
A. The Staff Calls the Games
It may have seemed like I was being hard on Illinois during the Argument. It turns out, I'm higher on the Illini than almost anyone else on the staff.
Graham Filler:
3-9 (1-7) with wins over SIU, NIU, Indiana
Jonathan Franz:
6-6 (2-6) with wins over Missouri, SIU, NIU, Indiana, Minnesota, Fresno State
Bama Hawkeye:
5-7 (2-6) with wins over SIU, NIU, Indiana, Minnesota, Fresno State
Paterno Ave:
3-9 (1-7) with wins over SIU, NIU, Minnesota
Jerdogg1:
4-8 (2-6) with wins over SIU, NIU, Indiana, Purdue
GregGoBlue:
4-8 (2-6) with wins over SIU, NIU, Indiana, Minnesota
Hilary Lee:
2-10 (0-8) with wins over SIU, Fresno State
34 comments
|
0 recs |
Do you like this story?
Comments
They actually went to bowl games in the 1990s. Maybe not any big ones, but still, they'd make the postseason as an average team.
Word of warning: The Illini could get screwed with a horrendous officiating gaffe out in Fresno. WAC Officials are about as bad as Todd Boeckman’s 2008 season…
My kingdom for a spellchecker. Or Devin Harris. Hopefully both.
For all the crap we give Wil Wheaton, he can still tackle better than Asante Samuel...
"What's your formula for the corner?" -Doctor Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory
by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Aug 27, 2010 3:09 PM CDT up reply actions
Believe it or not
WAC officials are WORSE…
My kingdom for a spellchecker. Or Devin Harris. Hopefully both.
For all the crap we give Wil Wheaton, he can still tackle better than Asante Samuel...
Manning drops back to pass, Comedic.Sans and Wilfork come flying in and SACK him for a loss of twelve on 3rd and goal!
by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Aug 27, 2010 11:20 PM CDT up reply actions
In the last ten years, no other team in college football has both gone to two BCS Bowls AND won 3 games or fewer five times.
That’s like the old Philadelphia Athletics — they either won the World Series (5 times) or finished last in the American League.
"Never mistake motion for action." - Ernest Hemingway
Similarly to the Philadephia Athletics
the last time Illinois was feared was in the late 40’s/early 50’s.
Less memorable than Sam Okey's Hawkeye career.
by Kyle McCann't on Aug 27, 2010 11:06 AM CDT up reply actions
That would really redefine the Big Ten road trip...
My kingdom for a spellchecker. Or Devin Harris. Hopefully both.
For all the crap we give Wil Wheaton, he can still tackle better than Asante Samuel...
"What's your formula for the corner?" -Doctor Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory
by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Aug 27, 2010 3:07 PM CDT up reply actions
Well since the West Coast = Big Ten Kryptonite
that could actually work in the Illini’s favor.
Less memorable than Sam Okey's Hawkeye career.
by Kyle McCann't on Aug 27, 2010 8:28 PM CDT up reply actions
Via Kansas City!!
"Whoever said that the pen is mightier than the sword never encountered automatic weapons."
You mean late 20's/early 30's for the A's
They were a doormat in the late 40’s and gone to KC by ’54.
Plus the deadball era,
don’t forget Frank Baker.
"Never mistake motion for action." - Ernest Hemingway
Of COURSE I meant the 20's/30's A's!
I mean, who doesn’t know that!?!
Less memorable than Sam Okey's Hawkeye career.
by Kyle McCann't on Aug 27, 2010 8:27 PM CDT up reply actions
Of course that A's team
was the greatest baseball team to ever take the field.
Sorry Yankees fans.
"Never mistake motion for action." - Ernest Hemingway
No mention of the 10's A's?
They won THREE World Series…
My kingdom for a spellchecker. Or Devin Harris. Hopefully both.
For all the crap we give Wil Wheaton, he can still tackle better than Asante Samuel...
Manning drops back to pass, Comedic.Sans and Wilfork come flying in and SACK him for a loss of twelve on 3rd and goal!
by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Aug 29, 2010 1:33 AM CDT up reply actions
Wow, lively discussion
If a team sucks in the forest and no one is around to care, does Ron Zook still get fired?
Yes, still yes.
by Batman42 on Aug 27, 2010 11:16 AM CDT via mobile reply actions 1 recs
As it's been mentioned
Nothing would make me laugh more than if they’re terrible, and the state can’t afford to buy him out, so he’s back for 2011.
It never gets to be easy
by chitownhawkeye on Aug 27, 2010 7:35 PM CDT up reply actions
So, it should really read
Illinois: The Colorado of the Big Ten
I ate the blue ones ... they taste like burning.
i thought
that’s basically what happened this past off season?
Doesn’t seem very moral to me. Might as well take Satan’s autograph while you’re at it. - N.C.
zzzzzzzzzzzzzz
When asked why he went for 5, Tate responded "..because I couldn't go for 6...".
http://www.insidetheshoe.com/
by SouthBayBuckeye on Aug 27, 2010 1:37 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs
What this teaches us
is that 2007 Illinois had no business going to the Rose Bowl.
My kingdom for a spellchecker. Or Devin Harris. Hopefully both.
For all the crap we give Wil Wheaton, he can still tackle better than Asante Samuel...
"What's your formula for the corner?" -Doctor Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory
by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Aug 27, 2010 3:06 PM CDT reply actions
You could also argue that they have no business
going 3-9 or 2-10 either. THey have some talent on that team, or did. How Juice Williams didn’t develop into one of the most feared offensive weapons in the Big Ten is beyond me.
Like it was beyond the Zooker, apparently…
"Whoever said that the pen is mightier than the sword never encountered automatic weapons."
At least they defeated Michigan and Minnesota
and almost no one else…
My kingdom for a spellchecker. Or Devin Harris. Hopefully both.
For all the crap we give Wil Wheaton, he can still tackle better than Asante Samuel...
Manning drops back to pass, Comedic.Sans and Wilfork come flying in and SACK him for a loss of twelve on 3rd and goal!
by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Aug 27, 2010 9:26 PM CDT up reply actions
sigh
it was so frustrating. but the guy i feel for the worst is arrelious benn. extremely hardworking, likable guy. couldn’t shake the injury bug and couldn’t get zook and staff to design any plays for him besides the fatal bubble screen or a motion to the backfield for an option. besides the kick return against psu, i’ll always remember one play: the ~50 yard touchdown reception in the rose bowl after the game had been decided. immediately after the score, rejus chucked the ball at the usc band out of frustration. i imagine he felt that way for 3 years.
Doesn’t seem very moral to me. Might as well take Satan’s autograph while you’re at it. - N.C.
Yeah, had Benn been in an offense that would've maximized his skills
He would’ve been an all time great
"Whoever said that the pen is mightier than the sword never encountered automatic weapons."
Yet another reason
Benn should have gone to Wisconsin.
Paul Chryst makes good use of the WRs. Brandon Williams and Nick Toon got plenty of passes…
My kingdom for a spellchecker. Or Devin Harris. Hopefully both.
For all the crap we give Wil Wheaton, he can still tackle better than Asante Samuel...
Manning drops back to pass, Comedic.Sans and Wilfork come flying in and SACK him for a loss of twelve on 3rd and goal!
by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Aug 29, 2010 1:35 AM CDT up reply actions
Well, like Charles Barkley would say
Illinois is going to be trrrrrrrrible, just trrrrrrible.
"Whoever said that the pen is mightier than the sword never encountered automatic weapons."
Well, remember when they came out of nowhere in 07?
They could do that this season. But they need to set their sights on beating Northwestern first before they go anywhere.
My kingdom for a spellchecker. Or Devin Harris. Hopefully both.
For all the crap we give Wil Wheaton, he can still tackle better than Asante Samuel...
Manning drops back to pass, Comedic.Sans and Wilfork come flying in and SACK him for a loss of twelve on 3rd and goal!
by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Aug 27, 2010 9:26 PM CDT up reply actions
having a pre-season doak walker candidate
results in lacking a proven running back? i was under the impression that the backfield was the team’s strength on offense.
When I was a kid, I didn't want to be a doctor or a fireman. I wanted to be Super Mario. It's the most literal pipe dream I've ever had.
On an unrelated note:
I’ve eclipsed 1,000 comments on this site.
There needs to be some sort of on-screen fireworks. Or stealing the Penn State fight song. I don’t know.
My kingdom for a spellchecker. Or Devin Harris. Hopefully both.
For all the crap we give Wil Wheaton, he can still tackle better than Asante Samuel...
Manning drops back to pass, Comedic.Sans and Wilfork come flying in and SACK him for a loss of twelve on 3rd and goal!
by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Aug 29, 2010 1:38 AM CDT reply actions





















