As every college football message board debater knows, winning football games is transitive.  In other words, if Team A beats Team B and Team B beats Team C, the fans of Team A are perfectly within their rights to talk trash to fans of Team C.  Obviously, Team A could have completely wiped the floor with Team C, they just didn't happen to play each other.  If Team D happens to lose to Team C, they are also deserving of as much scorn as possible.

Thus one way of ranking teams just counts how many teams' fans are permissible trash talk targets (minus those in the reverse situation).  

Note: no FCS wins (or losses) are counted

1. Northwestern (#9t in the country)

Transitive Win/Loss Record: 18-0

Northwestern picked up 2 transitive wins from their victory over CMU, but the biggest gain came from North Texas beating FAU, leading to an NU-Rice-UNT-FAU-UAB-Troy-BGSU-Marshall-Ohio chain.  Had Cincinnati succeeded in their comeback against Oklahoma, the NU-Vanderbilt-Mississippi-Fresno State-Cincinnati-Oklahoma-FSU-BYU-Washington-Syracuse-Akron chain would have improved the Wildcats' standing even further.  

Next Week: Minnesota, worth 5 transitive wins or 9 transitive losses.

2. Michigan State (#17t)

Transitive Win/Loss Record: 12-0

MSU's win over FAU allows them to have a similar chain as Northwestern, though beating up Northern Colorado nets them no gain here.  

Next Week: Wisconsin, worth 5 wins or 1 loss

3. Michigan (#24t)

Transitive Win/Loss Record: 8-0

Each of Michigan's 3 beaten FBS opponents have won a game, a claim no one below them can make.  

Next Week:  Indiana, worth 3 wins or 1 loss

4t. Nebraska (#27t)

Transitive Win/Loss Record: 7-0

Nebraska next game is against KSU, who is tied with Arizona and Stanford for most transitive wins overall.  

Next Week: Bye

4t. Iowa (#27t) 

Transitive Win/Loss Record: 8-1

The Hawkeyes' win over Iowa State helps quite a bit.  It leads to this chain: Iowa State-NIU-Minn-MTSU-ULL-Ark State-ULM, giving them seven of their eight wins.  

Next Week: Penn State, worth 7 wins or 2 losses.

6t. Ohio State (#33t)

Transitive Win/Loss Record: 5-0

Ohio State has looked impressive, but their opponents have not.  The Miami win will be more helpful in the future, but right now the 'Canes only win is against 0-2 Pitt.  

Next Week: Illinois, worth 7 wins or 2 losses

6t. Penn State (#33t)

Transitive Win/Loss Record: 6-1

The Temple win counted for five; the win over 0-2 Kent State still only counts for one.  

Next Week: Iowa, worth 9 wins or 2 losses.

6t.  Illinois (#33t)

Transitive Win/Loss Record: 6-1

The win over NIU looks rather decent now and the loss to as of yet undefeated Missouri doesn't hurt very much.  

Next Week: OSU, worth 6 transitive wins or 1 loss

9.  Wisconsin (#42t)

Transitive Win/Loss Record: 4-0

The only FBS win that Wisconsin's opponents have is UNLV over 0-4 New Mexico.  

Next Week: Michigan State, worth 13 transitive wins or 1 loss

10. Indiana (#51t)

Transitive Win/Loss Record: 2-0

Indiana falls into the "nothing ventured, nothing gained (or lost)" category.  While they are undefeated, they have only played two FBS schools whose combined record is 0-7.  

Next Week: Michigan, worth 9 transitive wins or 1 loss

11. Minnesota (#83t)

Transitive Win/Loss Record: 4-8

Minnesota's loss against North Dakota doesn't count here, but losing to NIU hurts because it puts them towards the bottom end of the same chain that helps Iowa.  The win over MTSU keeps them from the bottom of the conference.

Next Week: Northwestern, worth 19 transitive wins or 1 loss.  

12. Purdue (#86t)

Transitive Win/Loss Record: 1-6

At this point, the loss to 1-3 ND is hurting Purdue more than the loss to 3-1 Toledo, but neither helps.  Their only win is against 0-2 Ball State.  

Next Week: Bye