Post Week 6 B1G Power Poll, Internet Meme Edition
by Ted Glover on Oct 10, 2011 5:40 PM CDT
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Let's be honest. Two of the easiest columns to write (and get feedback from your readers) are 1) the power rankings column and 2) the pop culture comparison column. Much like that magical day when somebody got their peanut butter on my chocolate (or did I get my chocolate in her peanut butter?), it was predestined that one day these two great columns would be brought together...
Halfway into the season, we have some perceptions about our teams and our conference. Memes, if you will:
Wisconsin is pretty good. Minnesota is an all time terrible team. Joe Bauserman might be the worst Big Ten quarterback within the last 25 years. Michigan is much better than most people thought. Illinois is the best team in the Big Ten no one is talking about.
And since we have memes, and this is an Internet site, if ever there would be a confluence of peanut butter and chocolate, this would be it.
1. Wisconsin--Awesome Wisconsin is Awesome, 144 Points (12 First place votes)
If you're really, really good, you're an awesome sandwich, even during your bye week.
2. Michigan--They See Me Rollin', They Hatin', 127 Points
Michigan scores a double meme coup, the 'rollin'' meme combined with the 'Joseph Ducreux' meme.
3. Illinois--I Can't Hear You Over The Sound Of How Awesome I Am, 124 Points
Is there a better matched meme to a team and their coach right now? No, no there is not.
4. Michigan State--This is Sparta, 104 Points
Admit it, you saw this one coming from a mile away, didn't you?
5. Nebraska--U mad, bro?, 99 Points
Probably, but you shouldn't be, after that epic comeback win against OSU.
6. Penn State-- I'm Not Saying It's Aliens, But It's Aliens, 84 Points
Good but not great defense, bad quarterbacks, yet you're 5-1. I'm not saying it's aliens, but it's aliens.
7. Ohio State--Epic Fail, 68 Points
Looked good on paper, but when translated on the field, it's hideous.
8. Iowa-- Numa Numa, 66 Points
Much like this video, what Iowa did in Happy Valley wasn't football, either.
9. Northwestern--Craig James Did Not Kill 5 Hookers At SMU, 48 Points
It's funny because it's NOT TRUE--Craig James DID NOT kill 5 hookers at SMU. Much like the phrases 'Heisman winner Dan Persa' and 'Northwestern, B1G Champions' aren't true, either. As much as Northwestern fan would like them to be.
10. Purdue-- I can haz cheezburger? 35 Points
When you beat Minnesota, u can haz cheezburger.
11. Indiana-- WTF...Seriously, WTF is that? 25 Points
Because it isn't competitive football, that's for sure.
12. Minnesota--Kill It With Fire, 12 Points
Yeah, it's that bad.
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FUCK CLEMSON!
It’s not a true meme edition without that gem.
In the name of the Woody, the Bo, and the Mustache Ride. Amen.
by Pariahwulfen on Oct 10, 2011 5:50 PM CDT reply actions 6 recs
Is that like supposed to be an actual "In Loving Memory" for a person who died?
If so it is horrifying in a whole new way.
But I think it’s actually a huge win. I think he got a tattoo artist to do his wife as a zombie and make a fake In Loving Memory thing. I want to believe this so I can sleep at night.
It looks like the "In Loving Memory" might, just might, be red Magic Marker.
Or maybe for the sake of the person with the tat I just hope that’s not a memorial.
by Midnight Rambler on Oct 11, 2011 9:48 AM CDT up reply actions
Penn State has allowed 29 points in their last 4 games combined
2 of which were against Sagarin top 50 teams, 2 of which were road games, and this isn’t a great defense?
GO IOWA AWESOME, now and forever, unless PSU sees them in the B1G CG
Beat OMHR
I agree.
What is Penn State going to have to do to prove they have a good defense?
Despite multiple turnovers and giving Alabama field position all day, they held the Tide to season lows in every offensive category. If Penn State had ANY semblance of an offense or can at least sustain a drive, Alabama probably scores 17 at the most.
by TheHumbleBuckeye on Oct 10, 2011 6:50 PM CDT up reply actions
First it's 'quit bagging on us because JoePa is old'
now it’s ‘whaddaya mean our defense isn’t great?!’
You Penn State fans are damn impossible to please. :)
Some people just need a high five. In the face. With a chair.
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Kind of have to shut down a decent team to get people on that bandwagon...
Iowa? I’m an Iowa fan and even I am not impressed.
Wasn’t Michigan more defensively dominant over Eastern Michigan than Penn State? PSU will have their shot to prove their worth. That schedule at the end will define them.
"I wish you luck with a capital 'F'" - The Real Elvis.
by StoopsMyAss on Oct 11, 2011 10:49 AM CDT up reply actions
No. Penn State was much better defensively against EMU than Michigan
PSU pulled their starters with 11:50 left to go in the game, so these numbers reflect the stats before then. Michigan pulled their starters at 4:32 left, the numbers reflect the same.
Also, EMU had the ball at the end of the first half of each. They took two knees to end the half against PSU. This does not count as a meaningful possession. They had roughly 1/2 of a meaningful possession against Michigan, as kicking a 50 yd FG on 3rd and 3 to end the half would suggest.
EMU first downs per possession: vs. PSU—1.0, vs. Michigan—1.3
EMU yards per possession: PSU—18.2 Michigan—26.2
EMU points: PSU—3, following a interception at the PSU 21, Michigan-3, following a 72 yard drive that ended at the Michigan 4
EMU’s raw offensive numbers against Michigan were depressed by a Michigan offense that controlled the clock and went on long scoring drives. Per possession, Michigan’s defense was not particularly close to PSU’s.
GO IOWA AWESOME, now and forever, unless PSU sees them in the B1G CG
Beat OMHR
I think your reaching...your defense is
at this point, about where Michigan’s is given the common opponent. I mean, are you really going to try to make a national case for your stats with these opponents? No one will take you seriously. Just go look at who LSU has played, and where they have played them. Your not in the same hemisphere with that sort of team.
"I wish you luck with a capital 'F'" - The Real Elvis.
lolwut
at this point, about where Michigan’s is given the common opponent.
You can say that, but I demonstrated that you were very wrong.
I mean, are you really going to try to make a national case for your stats with these opponents?
You did that first. I demonstrated that you were very wrong.
Just go look at who LSU has played, and where they have played them. Your not in the same hemisphere with that sort of team.
I didn’t make a comparison with LSU, and I haven’t broken down their per possession stats or their opponents. I will say that I would take 6 of PSU’s front 7 over LSU’s, and as Iowa found out, that secondary is no slouch.
GO IOWA AWESOME, now and forever, unless PSU sees them in the B1G CG
Beat OMHR
you're nuts
football is played on grass field, not a spreadsheet. You’re of your generation, you’re a fantasy player, so this is going nowhere.
"I wish you luck with a capital 'F'" - The Real Elvis.
what are you basing your assertion that Michigan's defense dominated EMU more than Penn State's, then?
if not stats, then what?
Fire Dan Snyder
by Cari Greene on Oct 13, 2011 12:28 PM CDT up reply actions
I couldn't stop laughing
I almost sprayed beer all over my laptop…
When we get the Pig, the Jug and the Axe, we'll have one hell of a picnic
Future Power Poll suggestion:
BTN commercials. (Rotel, Barbasol, Napa Know How, Haas avocados… maybe even throw in commercials for BTN, like JoePa telling to you come to Penn State while he poops on your couch)
by cbrett42 on Oct 10, 2011 7:35 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs
Don't forget Tom Crean breaking a clipboard
A futile crusade to prevent mass ignorance
HammerAndRails, SBNation's Boilermaker Blog
There is only one proper response to that
In the name of the Woody, the Bo, and the Mustache Ride. Amen.
by Pariahwulfen on Oct 11, 2011 8:31 AM CDT up reply actions
More Northwestern
I don’t always have an Achilles tendon.
But when I do, it’s #persastrong.
Also, don’t forget “Northwestern, Chicago’s Big Ten team” in the list of false statements
by truemichiganman on Oct 10, 2011 7:43 PM CDT reply actions
Great post
Love it. Still wish “Me Gusta” and “Forever Alone” would have made the list. Forever Alone would have been perfect for Minny
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by Ian_InsideTheShoe on Oct 10, 2011 8:20 PM CDT reply actions
Me Gusta could have worked for Purdue.
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by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Oct 10, 2011 8:37 PM CDT up reply actions
Possible suggestion: Wisconsin is the Falcon Punch.
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by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Oct 10, 2011 8:37 PM CDT reply actions
/sobs
/tearsACL
In the name of the Woody, the Bo, and the Mustache Ride. Amen.
by Pariahwulfen on Oct 11, 2011 8:39 AM CDT up reply actions
Let me help you with that...
When we get the Pig, the Jug and the Axe, we'll have one hell of a picnic
by Marshmoose on Oct 10, 2011 10:56 PM CDT reply actions 12 recs
Nice, but there should've been a picture of Brew
in the flames as opposed to other B1G mascots. There must be a lot of dislike between those two right now. I’ve never seen a head coach do multiple backhanded bitch slaps at a previous head coach than Kill has done with Brewster.
Some people just need a high five. In the face. With a chair.
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The third-worst part about the recent exchange between Kill and Brewster:
Kill is pretty much telling his current players they aren’t any good:
"We’re not athletically gifted enough. We’re getting slower. You have to recruit tough, you don’t make them tough. You have to recruit tacklers," Kill said. http://www.mndaily.com/2011/10/04/kill-doesn%25E2%2580%2599t-mince-words-brewster-left-football-team-rough-shape
The second-worst part? Brewster pointing out that this group of players almost beat USC, and the core of this year’s trainwreck beat Illinois and Iowa last year.
The very worst part? Brewster has a valid point.
Kill did confirm what I suspected, which is that he needs to completely blow up this squad and re-build from scratch. I remain confident that approach is the correct one, but oh is it going to make for some horrible, horrible Gopher football in the next two months.
by Midnight Rambler on Oct 11, 2011 9:54 AM CDT up reply actions
Two months?
Try next two years….
(I agree Kill will get it done provided his health cooperates….but it’s going to be some tough times in the Twin Cities for the foreseeable future)
Oh, it will be a couple years before Minnesota is competitive in the conference.
I don’t expect Kill to win seven games or anything crazy like that next season, but I do hope that Purdue won’t hang twenty-four points on them in the first quarter.
I expect the Gophers to beat New Hampshire in 2012, and maybe even Western Michigan and/or Syracuse and/or UNLV. Beating Purdue next year is unlikely (so far as anyone can project anything this far in advance), but not completely outside the realm of possibility.
This ridiculously-premature prediction/guess actually looks good to me, because if they played right now, WMU would stomp the Gophers, and I wouldn’t bet the farm on them beating New Hampshire, either.
For me, a four-win season for Minnesota next year will not be “horrible”; “horrible” to me is losing at home to NDSU, losing by fifty-eight to Michigan, and whatever Wisconsin is going to do to the Gophers in a month or so.
by Midnight Rambler on Oct 11, 2011 10:46 AM CDT up reply actions
He's got a point about USC maybe...
…but I most Gopher fans (including me) just assumed the Iowa and Illinois wins would transfer when there were plenty of changes (new coaches, new system, new QB’s, etc) that could suggest the strong potential for problems. I like many chose to be optimistic. Clearly that didn’t work out.
Horton said at the end of last season that his goal was to remove all pressure from the team and make things fun. Holding guys accountable (given the academic ineligibility issues Kill found when he arrived) was clearly not part of that. Being held accountable by a new coaching staff is likely not fun or without pressure. It would seem that some older members of the team are not reacting well to that + losing.
I agree with you that Kill’s approach is the right way, but yea, there could be some not so good games ahead.
Ask and you shall recieve
Hard to get a full-body shot of Brewster, but it’ll work…
When we get the Pig, the Jug and the Axe, we'll have one hell of a picnic
by Marshmoose on Oct 11, 2011 11:38 AM CDT up reply actions 9 recs
Oh, but to be able to rec more than once
Well done!
Some people just need a high five. In the face. With a chair.
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I don't care about the others
But yes, kill Lil’ Red with fire. Or bullets. Or just a simple needle. Whatever. Just end that thing.
Illinois 6-0? You can't explain that.
They have two liter bottles now? To think I spent all that time demanding a liter!
There we go.
If you think IU football fans are long-suffering, you clearly haven't been tailgating with us lately.
by HoosierCheesehead on Oct 11, 2011 8:47 AM CDT up reply actions 3 recs
I see a REAL AMERICAN HERO to the left of Zook's head in this picture
by I-L-L-matic on Oct 11, 2011 10:18 AM CDT up reply actions 5 recs
I miss him.
"Many people need desperately to receive this message: 'I feel and think much as you do, care about many of the things you care about, although most people do not care about them. You are not alone.'"
I miss him, too.
On the bright side, one of our current linebackers gave us a priceless gift that will live on the internet forever – and one that perfectly describes Northwestern football in the second half of games:
by I-L-L-matic on Oct 11, 2011 12:52 PM CDT up reply actions
Not sure why, but my favorite part of that has to be the enthusiastic flag toss by the ref entering the scene at the end.
by Franklin7777 on Oct 11, 2011 12:58 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
My favorite part would be...
…an Illinois fan finding a way to glorify a horrible (and stupid/poorly executed) cheap shot.
My favorite part has been the indignant outrage all over the interwebs.
Gadzooks! One player cheapshotted another player. Surely this never happens ever!
Was it dumb? Yup. Was it classless? Yup. Is everyone getting a little overexcited with their moral outrage? Yup.
"Many people need desperately to receive this message: 'I feel and think much as you do, care about many of the things you care about, although most people do not care about them. You are not alone.'"
Correct.
It’s a man getting hit in the marbles. There’s a reason America’s Funniest Home Videos and Jackass were so successful.
"Many people need desperately to receive this message: 'I feel and think much as you do, care about many of the things you care about, although most people do not care about them. You are not alone.'"
Yep
Insert a funny sound effect and a laugh track and everyone thinks it’s hilarious
Mikael Granlund: The Great Hope
by NorthernStar on Oct 11, 2011 2:09 PM CDT up reply actions
Bob Saget?
Explains AFHV.
If you think IU football fans are long-suffering, you clearly haven't been tailgating with us lately.
by HoosierCheesehead on Oct 11, 2011 5:01 PM CDT up reply actions
Actually, yea...
…I don’t think it’s the end of the effing world. I also don’t think it’s very funny. Something tells me the Illinois on Northwestern element is playing in here.
As an NU fan
I agree. The call on the field for personal foul was correctly made. It was dumb and classless but he apologized later. Let’s move on. I do like the Illini-NU hate factor escalating, even if it is for a monopoly piece.
Hmm...
Would it have been better if he used a ball instead of his knee?
by I-L-L-matic on Oct 11, 2011 1:56 PM CDT up reply actions 2 recs
Actually, this one would be better if it was Aaron Rodgers' knee
by I-L-L-matic on Oct 11, 2011 2:15 PM CDT up reply actions 3 recs
Come on, man, that's what you have to resort to?
Awfully classy.
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by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Oct 11, 2011 4:50 PM CDT up reply actions
For accurate effect, it should be Johnny Jolly.
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by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Oct 11, 2011 7:00 PM CDT up reply actions
Then he could put on the belt.
I’m a Bears fan, but Rodgers has been my fantasy QB in a keeper league for the last 3 years. This describes how I feel about him.
Damn you beat me to it
And it’s in gif format.
That being said, I like the Australian guy better.
They have two liter bottles now? To think I spent all that time demanding a liter!
Wait, I found the answer
They have two liter bottles now? To think I spent all that time demanding a liter!
by Say Ramrod on Oct 11, 2011 7:49 PM CDT up reply actions 3 recs
Don't get me wrong
I love the posts on this site, but this thread takes the cake. I seriously have laughed way too hard at some of these.
They have two liter bottles now? To think I spent all that time demanding a liter!
Joe Bauserman might be the worst Big Ten quarterback within the last 25 years.
Is there any question? The guy is 27 years old and can’t throw a spiral. He has been in the program since Woody and still can’t complete a pass. He absolutely has my vote as worst. Hell, he PROBABLY wouldn’t even start at iowa :)
He probably couldn't beat out Allan Evridge.
And that’s just sad.
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by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Oct 11, 2011 8:48 AM CDT up reply actions
I'd rather play Justin "Booger Sugar" Feagin at QB
and that is just sad
You win with people (not name Joe Bauserman)
You'd take Belli-sorry for an extra year of eligibility, instead of Bauserman?
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by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Oct 11, 2011 12:29 PM CDT up reply actions
I will regretfully acknowledge that IU is in its proper spot
I am not sure about 2-6. I am not sure about 7-10. But I do love the fact that tOSU is clearly and squarely within the group at 7-10. Best part of my weekend (other than Ashland hanging 70 on Tiffin) was waking up on Sunday to find out that the Useless Nuts had lost that game.
by hoosierdaddynow on Oct 11, 2011 7:43 AM CDT reply actions
Indiana Football:
There is always basketball seaso…….nevermind
You win with people (not name Joe Bauserman)
by BuckeyeSki on Oct 11, 2011 9:27 AM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
If you think IU football fans are long-suffering, you clearly haven't been tailgating with us lately.
by HoosierCheesehead on Oct 11, 2011 10:33 AM CDT up reply actions 4 recs
Hate to inform you that tOSU’s troubles don’t make your teams any better. Wait until basketball season :)
Yeah.
You have Sullinger, Buford, and Craft who are proven, and really nobody else who is at this stage. I’m amazed that you guys are considered such heavy favorites despite the fact that all three of your best shooters are gone. I don’t think that will last.
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by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Oct 11, 2011 4:51 PM CDT up reply actions
And many others.
Thomas, Williams and a pretty deep bench. Sullinger dropped weight and will be playing his natural PF position.
I don't think Buford is better than Hardaway Jr., Jordan Morgan, Robbie Hummel, or Jordan Taylor.
Sullinger is definitely one of the best players in the league.
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by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Oct 11, 2011 7:56 PM CDT up reply actions
Buford frustrates me.
He does disappear sometimes. Sully is one of the best players in the country. I am excited to see him play the 4 this year. I look for D. Thomas to really emerge this year.
Understood
But schadenfreude is usually all we have during football season.
by hoosierdaddynow on Oct 12, 2011 11:38 AM CDT up reply actions
tl; dr
If you think IU football fans are long-suffering, you clearly haven't been tailgating with us lately.
by HoosierCheesehead on Oct 11, 2011 8:05 AM CDT reply actions 2 recs
As long as we're on the mashup of football and internet memes...
Somebody’s making t-shirts out of these. It must suck to be a fan of a Florida football team right now.
Author at Acme Packing Company
by texwestern on Oct 11, 2011 8:09 AM CDT reply actions 4 recs
A little over the top for Florida
I know they got blown out twice, but they’ve only lost to the top 2 teams, and that was with their 2nd or 3rd string QBs.
Yeah, it's only a down year by Florida standards, and no one picked the Gators to be MNC contenders this year.
Florida State, on the other hand, was supposed to be good, and is falling flat…again.
by Midnight Rambler on Oct 11, 2011 9:57 AM CDT up reply actions
WHERE ARE THESE ON THE INTERNETS???
If you think IU football fans are long-suffering, you clearly haven't been tailgating with us lately.
by HoosierCheesehead on Oct 11, 2011 10:34 AM CDT up reply actions
Here's my submission for Minnesota
by Franklin7777 on Oct 11, 2011 11:44 AM CDT reply actions 14 recs
I can't wait
for this weekend. There are some quality conference games on Saturday. Michigan – Michigan State is a beautiful way to start the day, I really want to see how Illinois plays against the Buckeyes after that, and then we get to see how Iowa rebounds against Northwestern. Solid slate.
Maybe I’m mostly excited because I don’t have to worry about having a coronary over the Blackshirts this weekend.
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