New Mascots for a New Era in Big Ten Football
by babaoreally on Oct 27, 2011 9:00 AM CDT
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PrintMost of the Big Ten mascots have been around for awhile. The conference is steeped in tradition, and the mascots are a part of that tradition. Mess with it, like Purdue did with New Purdue Pete during the off-season, and the fans get mad. If a school decides to update or change a mascot, they better get it right. Just because the last new mascot was an utter failure doesn't mean we should stop trying. Times have changed, the game of football has changed, the number of teams in the Big Ten has changed, and it is time for the mascots to change. I am here to offer some suggestions to a few schools, knowing that they may be met with derision.
The Illi Noid
In 2007, Illinois stopped using Chief Illiniwek as their official mascot. No one has stepped forward with a reasonable replacement until now. Most Illini fans want to fire Zook, but why not dress him up as an old advertising mascot? He is already viewed by many as a cartoon character, so let's just take this to its natural conclusion. And who doesn't like a good pun?
A few more on the next page:
Really Old Purdue Pete
Well, the Purdue fans didn't like New Purdue Pete. Instead of just going back to the last Pete, let's go way back. One of the reasons that was given for New Pete was that Normal Pete was scaring kids. Normal Pete has nothing on this freak. Really Old Purdue Pete's giant misshapen paper-mache head makes it hard for the mascot to walk. If the goal of mascots is to scare children, walk like a zombie and look like their faces got hit by a bus, then Really Old Purdue Pete might be one of the best ever.
Pro Combat Stanzi
(created by RossWB and Horace at BHGP)
The fine folks at BHGP made this as a reaction to the all of the crazy Pro Combat and State Flag-inspired alternate jerseys that have been all over college football this season. Since the team isn't going to wear these crazy get-ups, let's make the mascot do it. I think everyone can agree that Herky is washed up and played out. Since Ricky Stanzi is treated like a deity by many Iowans (and some non-Iowans), let's just make him the mascot. Pro Combat Stanzi can sing the National Anthem before the game and give a stirring post-game interview if called upon.
Hoosier Johnny Cougar
Indiana University doesn't have a mascot. The term Hoosier is just a term for someone who lives in the state, so I guess IU could just trot out a random guy from Bartholomew County and call him a mascot, but they don't. The Hoosiers have made the correct decision to go without a mascot until someone comes up with a great idea. Hoosier Johnny Cougar is that great idea. It combines the head of IU benefactor John Mellencamp with the body of a cougar. When IU finally gets their act together and starts winning games, Hoosier Johnny Cougar will be there to make it "Hurt So Good".
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Old Purdue Pete
Either that mask is paper mache, or someone had one hell of a puberty.
I was thinking stick of butter
embedded in his head. That can’t be good
"'Contrariwise,' continued Tweedledee, 'If it was so, it might be; and if it were so, it would be; as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic." - Lewis Caroll, Alice Through the Looking Glass
by chitownhawkeye on Oct 27, 2011 9:37 AM CDT up reply actions
I hadn't heard about
the Purdue mascot debate, but thinks haven’t been the same since we lost the old Herbie Husker:
oh my
Off Tackle Empire
The quintessential Big Ten smoking room.
by Graham Filler on Oct 27, 2011 10:10 AM CDT up reply actions
You don't remember that Herbie?
Graham, you’re not that young.
Less memorable than Sam Okey's Hawkeye career.
by Kyle McCann't on Oct 27, 2011 11:20 AM CDT up reply actions
Is that an ear of corn sticking out of your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
It’s…actually an ear of corn?
Oh.
by cwel87 on Oct 27, 2011 10:16 AM CDT up reply actions 5 recs
What part of this looks "natural"?
Though in his mind, Old Herbie probably fancied himself as looking like Redford too.
Same screen name since AOL- 'cause like many Nebraska fans, I'm stuck in the '90s.
Purdue paid a marketing/design firm for this abomination....
And it did not go over well to say the least……
Ever Grateful. Ever True.
Given the time of year, I've finally figured out what this mascot reminds me of
It is the costume you’re stuck with when you go into the costume store the day of Halloween at 6 PM in a desperate attempt to find something for that night. All that you can say about it is (1) it was available; (2) it comprises a coherent theme; and (3) it fits.
I ate the blue ones ... they taste like burning.
by HoyaGoon on Oct 27, 2011 1:16 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
Here's how this went down
1. bring in the consultants, spend hours talking about the University, the ‘brand’, where they are and where they’d like to go.
2. ????
3. bring back the same mascot you pitch to everyone with a motion P on it
4. profit
>Hoosier by birth, Boilermaker by the grace of God
>Don't cry, MSU - It's just a game...
by sea.of.white on Oct 27, 2011 1:34 PM CDT up reply actions
I contend that Billy Mays was pitching this Pete to us
Before he kicked the bucket. Thats the only way the admin would have said “Yeah, he looks great!”
Maybe it was Vince from ShamWow.
Dosvidaniya, bitches! BTFU!
But, but, Pederson said we needed a fitter Herbie
Blue jeans = Cooler, Hipper Nebraska
Always check the words with the red squiggly line. They mean you probably screwed up.
Author @ Off Tackle Empire
by KennardHusker on Oct 27, 2011 11:20 AM CDT up reply actions
Clearly not corn-fed.
That Herbie eats a lot of soy…and is probably infertile.
Less memorable than Sam Okey's Hawkeye career.
by Kyle McCann't on Oct 27, 2011 11:21 AM CDT up reply actions 3 recs
yeah, but look at those hooves
possibly supplementing with oats as well?
>Hoosier by birth, Boilermaker by the grace of God
>Don't cry, MSU - It's just a game...
by sea.of.white on Oct 27, 2011 3:34 PM CDT up reply actions
Come on now, this is Nebraska, GMO feed > supplements
Always check the words with the red squiggly line. They mean you probably screwed up.
Author @ Off Tackle Empire
by KennardHusker on Oct 27, 2011 5:36 PM CDT up reply actions
The eyes...
they sparkle
See Ball, Get Ball. Quarterback Has Ball, Sack Him.
8-19-2010 Hell froze over, Painter has perfect passer rating
by 7_Painter's_First_Fan on Oct 28, 2011 12:50 PM CDT up reply actions
So Stanzi is now a French National?
Man, that dude switches allegiances faster than I switch off Badgers basketball games.
We were purchased from the French
I believe that Wisconsin was already owned/liberated from the British.
Explains how you guys rolled over and left this behind
/hatehatehatehatehateweek
When we get the Pig, the Jug and the Axe, we'll have one hell of a picnic
by Marshmoose on Oct 27, 2011 4:09 PM CDT up reply actions 4 recs
Please have the semen cleaned off of him
when we come to collect him this weekend.
Less memorable than Sam Okey's Hawkeye career.
by Kyle McCann't on Oct 28, 2011 1:25 AM CDT up reply actions
I will always respect Goldy
for being the only mascot willing to spin his head.
"If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull." - W.C. Fields
Wow, after this comment, I went looked up the history of the Golden Gophers
Goldy is modeled after the 13 lined ground squirrel,or “stripped gopher”. Also, from Wikipedia, Minnesota is called the gopher state not because of gophers. " Minnesota was tabbed the "Gopher State" in 1857 after a satirizing cartoon, depicting nine Gophers with the heads of local politicians pulling a locomotive, was published. The story was over legislative action for a $5 million railroad proposal in western Minnesota. Later, the University picked up the nickname."
The Golden part wasn’t added until the 30s, it was added because an announcer popularized it, commenting on their uniforms.
How can [ITEM NOT FOUND ERROR] have a mascot?
Or [NAME REDACTED]?
Author at Acme Packing Company, a Green Bay Packers blog, and Editor at BT Powerhouse, a Big Ten Basketball blog
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by OBrienSchofieldismyHero on Oct 27, 2011 12:20 PM CDT reply actions
Minnesota got ahead of the game by hiring its own live animal mascot.
Beep beep, out of my way! I'm a motorist!
by Cornbadger on Oct 27, 2011 12:47 PM CDT reply actions 2 recs
I see no resemblance.
Cheering for inconsistent, undisciplined teams [Twins, Wild, Packers, Hawkeyes] since 1989. "False Hope is better than No Hope"
They shouldn't have out-gained ND by almost 100 yards and somehow get blown out
I am still so utterly confused by that loss.
Special teams TD for ND + 85-yard interception return.
That’s 10 points not attributable to our defense (plus 7 the offense should have punched in immediately before the interception).
Just ask Wisconsin how important special teams are.
I've got this terrible pain in all the diodes down my left-hand side.
Bradley-Terry rankings for college football and basketball: because there aren't enough computer rankings already.
The fake field goal, too
I was more or less referencing that Notre Dame inexplicably blew out a game they, by most accounts, were outplayed in. That game was stupid.
by cwel87 on Oct 27, 2011 9:11 PM CDT via iPhone app up reply actions
Purdue Pete isn't our mascot
He’s more of our………………ambassador? Shit, I don’t know what he really is. He’s cool I guess, but our mascot is the Special. FYI.
Dosvidaniya, bitches! BTFU!
He's your secondary mascot
since a train tends to tear up the floor.
In the name of the Woody, the Bo, and the Mustache Ride. Amen.
by Pariahwulfen on Oct 27, 2011 2:23 PM CDT up reply actions
We built a little train to prevent that..........
Damn, we have like 14 mascots. WTF
Dosvidaniya, bitches! BTFU!
Wait...
…I thought you had so many because they kept sobbing and tearing their ACL’s?
by GoAUpher on Oct 27, 2011 5:09 PM CDT up reply actions 3 recs
Who do you think you are? Auburn?
"Everyone who drinks is not a poet. Maybe some of us drink because we're not poets." - Arthur Bach
yeah - that's right
Our mascot tears it up
>Hoosier by birth, Boilermaker by the grace of God
>Don't cry, MSU - It's just a game...
by sea.of.white on Oct 27, 2011 3:35 PM CDT up reply actions
I vote to keep Brutus Buckeye...
…because I wanna keep laughing at this photo:
When we get the Pig, the Jug and the Axe, we'll have one hell of a picnic
by Marshmoose on Oct 27, 2011 2:37 PM CDT up reply actions 11 recs
Oh Noes!!!!!111
>Hoosier by birth, Boilermaker by the grace of God
>Don't cry, MSU - It's just a game...
by sea.of.white on Oct 27, 2011 3:48 PM CDT up reply actions
Eh, I always thought this was kind of pathetic
Kid didn’t get that many good shots in, and you’re freaking Ohio
Schadenfreude ist die schoenste Freude
No no no
they’re ALL Brutus Buckeye, I just figured it might be a good idea to show how he’s evolved over the years.
In the name of the Woody, the Bo, and the Mustache Ride. Amen.
by Pariahwulfen on Oct 28, 2011 9:25 AM CDT up reply actions
Well, I guess I finished the series for you...
/NCAA’d
When we get the Pig, the Jug and the Axe, we'll have one hell of a picnic
Seriously, WTF is that 1965 thing? A tomato?
The Ohio State Tomato’s?
Wait a second………..Tomato’s! Rotel! I see a connection here
Dosvidaniya, bitches! BTFU!
Yes
Bob the Tomato
>Hoosier by birth, Boilermaker by the grace of God
>Don't cry, MSU - It's just a game...
by sea.of.white on Oct 27, 2011 3:47 PM CDT up reply actions
Don't forget the Barbasol eyebrows
When we get the Pig, the Jug and the Axe, we'll have one hell of a picnic
by Marshmoose on Oct 27, 2011 4:07 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
I am not 100% sure
But I think that 1965 mascot is racsit!
And t
So I tried the Barbasol and Rotel dip and I was very dissapointed!
And that 1979 one looks like a left testicle.
So I tried the Barbasol and Rotel dip and I was very dissapointed!
If your left testicle looks like that, I’d suggest you consult your physician ASAP.
(just so you know, testicles shouldn’t have eyeballs)
Or hats for that matter
In the name of the Woody, the Bo, and the Mustache Ride. Amen.
by Pariahwulfen on Oct 28, 2011 9:24 AM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
They should have kept the 1979 one
nothing like a mascot with googly eyes to say that like the student section, it’s probably drunk.
"'Contrariwise,' continued Tweedledee, 'If it was so, it might be; and if it were so, it would be; as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic." - Lewis Caroll, Alice Through the Looking Glass
by chitownhawkeye on Oct 27, 2011 4:57 PM CDT up reply actions
Bo Ryan likes new mascots
Cheering for inconsistent, undisciplined teams [Twins, Wild, Packers, Hawkeyes] since 1989. "False Hope is better than No Hope"
Have I said how much I hate Bo Ryan?
Because really, to be honest, he has kind of owned Izzo over the last decade. Starting with the home loss in 2003 (?) where Torbert’s tip-in at the buzzer was disallowed. Sigh. It never seems to go our way.
I understand why Wisconsin fans might hate Dantonio.
Ok... Seriously... What the hell is up with OTE?
I don’t mind these sort of posts on occasion. But seriously, you guys need more content. I’ve already said I have some stuff I could contribute.
This site is seriously slacking the past couple of weeks. Not that I have something against funny posts. They just don’t make for good conversation.
by TheHumbleBuckeye on Oct 27, 2011 9:42 PM CDT reply actions
Well, this post has 62 comments so far
but if by “good conversation” you mean arguments about things that have already happened that nobody agrees on and end in insults/immature behavior or arguments about things that are yet to happen that nobody agrees on and end in insults/immature behavior, then yes, this post is worthless.
Lighten’ up.
Less memorable than Sam Okey's Hawkeye career.
by Kyle McCann't on Oct 28, 2011 1:34 AM CDT up reply actions
The great thing about SBnation
are the option for fanposts. I’ve seen regular contributors become staff members on other SBnation sites, so if you genuinely have interesting material to contribute, I’m sure everyone would be happy to read and comment on that as well.
It's just been a rough set of weeks
for much of our staff. I’ve been sick (to the point of spending time in the ER), Ricardo has been traveling / off the grid, and Jon / Chad / JD / Ted / others have all had intermittent encounters with real life obligations.
Off Tackle Empire - Ruling over the Big Ten since 2008.
I've only done one fan post.
But it was very simple to publish. If you write well, well then do it. Doing it really well isn’t easy.
Dissenting without contributing is not helpful.
Also this shit used to just be about the rivalry, singular.
/Esquire’d
"GO HAWKS!" - only cure for Hawkeye Envy
by BentNotBroken on Oct 28, 2011 11:59 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
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