Inspired by the Big Ten players' poll(s) administered by the ESPN B1G blog, I decided to send out some questions to our writers here at Off Tackle Empire.** Naturally, their responses are anonymous for fear of self-incrimination/people labeling them closet Michigan fans. Ready? Here we go.
Question No. 1: What kind of offensive scheme do you think Chris Beatty will bring in 2012?
Who the fuck is Chad Beatty? - 12 votes
Question No. 2: How many conference games do you think Indiana will win this season?
Depends, is Indiana State a conference game? - 6 votes
/calls into radio show, is complete fuckhead - 2 votes
Jerry DiNardo - 2 votes
Who? -2 votes
One - 0 votes
Question No. 3: Who will be Iowa's leading rusher at the end of the season?
A self-propelled lawnmower - 6 votes
Chris Wienke, punter - 4 votes
Rex Burkhead. Wait, I thought the question was "who will run all over Iowa at the end of the season" - 1 vote
This guy (seen below) - 1 vote
Question No. 4: Will Michigan make the Rose Bowl?
Fuck Michigan - 9 votes
Is Brian Cook smug? - 2 votes
My name is Ted Glover and I'm secretly a Michigan fan. - 1 vote***
Question No. 5: Will Andrew Maxwell adequately fill the shoes of Kirk Cousins?
No - 6 votes
If by "adequately fill the shoes" do you mean "be terribly overrated"? If so, then yes. - 5 votes
Purdue will go 1-11 - 1 vote
Question No. 6: Will Minnesota get to keep the Floyd of Rosedale for another season?
Yes - 11 votes
Screw you guys - 1 vote
Question No. 7: Will Taylor Martinez complete 70% of his passes?
Results:- 12 votes
Question No. 8: Will Northwestern win a bowl game this season?
No - 10 votes
Against Iowa? - 1 vote
Fucksaw - 1 vote
Question No. 9: Will Ohio State "win" the Big Ten "East" this season?
/responds with inappropriate photoshop of masses of Ohio State fans juggling Urban Meyer's balls - 7 votes
Wait, isn't Braxton Miller their quarterback? LOL AWWWWW HEEEELL NAW - 4 votes
FACTS - 1 vote
Question No. 10: This question has been vacated.
Question No. 11: Who will end up starting at quarterback for Purdue?
Question No. 12: Are Wisconsin's alternate uniforms ugly as all fuckass?
Yes - #ALLOFTHEVOTES
Finally, it's link time. First up, team links:
- Day 4 update from Illinois football camp plus a photo gallery.
- A Lion Eye talks with Illinois OC Chris Beatty and has thoughts on the first full squad practice.
- Big day for the Hoosiers as they land 4-star safety Ben Davis.
- The Hoosiers also awarded 7 walk-ons scholarships. Not sure whether that's something to be proud of or something to be worried about.
- Notes from Indiana's final Tailgate Tour event. Indiana has tailgating?
- Tom Dienhart's answers reader mail and gives his thoughts on Iowa and true freshman.
- Iowa no. 2 tight end Ray Hamilton is working hard for playing time this fall.
- So goes James Vandenberg, so go the Hawkeyes.
- Michigan comes in at #8 in ESPN.com's preseason power poll, 4 spots ahead of Sparty and 6 in front of tOSU. Yes, apparently a news story needed to be written about this.
- The status of Frank Clark and Fitz Toussaint remains unchanged, as in they're still suspended, per Brady Hoke.
- Michigan receives a new 2014 commit in Ohio linebacker Michael Ferns. Remember, you have to be born in Ohio to be a real Michigan Man. Here's another article that points out Michigan is now beating tOSU in recruiting for 2014. Apparently, Ann Arbor has a few staff writers whose sole job is to troll tOSU.
- MSU receives a commitment from a third Bullough brother in Byron, who is part of the class of 2014.
- FBT speculates on Minnesota's new football facilities. PLEASE BRING BACK THE DOME. IOWA NEEDS A WIN IN MSP.
- Nebraska received a new commitment for the 2013 recruiting class in cornerback Jonathan Cook, a consensus 3-star prospect.
- Q&A with Nebraska safety PJ Smith.
- Northwestern continues its tradition of suiting up football players with absolutely absurd names by landing 4-star (Rivals 3-star) running back Godwin Igwebuike.
- Northwestern hopes Kain Colter will continue their tradition of plug and play quarterbacks with annoying names who beat Iowa.
- Speaking of Kain Colter, annoying names and Northwestern quarterbacks, backup quarterback Trevor Siemian will not concede the starting spot without a fight.
- SOP interviews John M from The Crimson Quarry. It's about football yet the words "Tom Crean" are naturally mentioned before the words "football."
- Part 2 of tOSU's schedule from easiest to toughest, via Land Grant Holy Land.
- 11W recruiting staff roundtable talks tOSU recruiting. Yes, 11W has a recruiting staff.
- First week impressions of Ohio State football via the Buckeye Battle Cry.
- Land Grant Holy Land asks a question that would've been absurd a few years ago: Was Jim Tressel Overrated?
- Matt McGloin is eager for a new offense.
- Only John Cappelletti Until Penn State Football (that means there's only 22 days left until football).
- The Penn State Board of Trustees will discuss NCAA consent decree on Sunday.
- BSD looks at the Wisconsin Badger's offseason.
- Coach BOB says it's time to stop the "dour attitude" that surrounds Penn State's football team.
- Hammer & Rails previews the Boilermaker's secondary.
- The UW Hall of Fame is going to honor Dick Bennett, Cory Raymer, Lawrence Johnson, Jim Haines, Karen Lunda and James Haluska.
- The Big Ten Thursday Mailbag from ESPN's B1G Blog.
- ESPN B1G blog has Le'Veon Bell as the 17th best player in the conference.
- Six B1G players are on SI's preseason All-American team.
- A couple B1G players pop up on SI's list of impact freshman for 2012.
* - This was totally fictional and zero OTE writers were polled. I made it all up.
** - Again, this didn't happen.
*** - LOL THIS ACTUALLY DID HAPPEN!