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Big Ten at Ten 1.17.2013: Things that are More Real than Manti Te'o's Girlfriend

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Matt Cashore-USA TODAY Sports

I thought about starting things off with talk about Lance Armstrong, and then I thought about moving towards jokes about how Deadspin has just made Oprah's shitlist for taking away ratings and thunder. But those things are not nearly as much fun as the following list of things that are more real than Lennay Kekua:

  • The Loch Ness Monster: While Nessie might be as fictitious as Lennay Kekua was, there are at least many more confirmed sightings of her with much better video proof and pictures. Additionally, Nessie's pictures have not been confirmed to be that of Godzilla, stripped right from his facebook page.
  • UFO's: According to an IB Times article this year, there have already been multiple sightings of Unidentified Flying Objects proving life outside of earth. While these are definitely subject to a bit of judgement calls on what exactly this all means, there are definitely at least more signs pointing towards UFO's than there are signs that Lennay Kekua existed and met with Manti Te'o on multiple occasions.
  • Jack Swarbrick Using the Term 'Catfished' on Live TV: I can see it now, Jack Swarbrick sits in his office flustered to no end. He has lost the NCG, he almost has lost his Coach, and there is a pile of 'DESTROY THESE FILES' on his desk. As he flips through another folder titled MTV, he shakes his head and angrily laments the days when kids weren't corrupted by the dirty television and ROCK AND ROLL MUSIC of the devil. I promise that seeing Swarbrick try to blame this on a generation run amok is one of the funniest things we never saw coming.
  • As Chad pointed out, Lizzy Seeberg committed suicide after bullying and intimidation after she was raped by a football player at Notre Dame with less fanfare and news coverage than this and it was swept under the rug by major media, school administrators, and the entire Notre Dame family: This really happened people. I understand that it's entirely too much fun to let this spiral out of control and for the outrage to reach fever pitch, as well it should, but let's not allow major media to lead the charge in the same way they have controlled the stories to this point. If there has ever been a time for 'New Media' to make a point, it's now.
On to the links and much more pleasant thoughts:
Finally, here's probably the best quote of the year:
I'm 59 years old. I don't care about these technology pets they have.

This man would kindly ask that you GET OFF HIS LAWN!!!