B1G 2014 // Welcome to the Rutgers Smoking Room: Off Topic Empire

The past few days have been a glorious combination of smack talk, gifs and surprisingly insightful and touching commentary. It has been truly wonderful. However, I think we're only scratching the surface of our ADD potential here people.

Let's really dig deep today, and see how far off course we can get. We're starting at football. Specifically, an American college football program playing in the Big Ten Conference in the fine state of New Jersey. We have some good starting points here.

Let's think of it like a game of telephone (seeing as how the telephone was developed a scant 20-minutes-depending-on-traffic from Rutgers). We'll start with a topic, discuss as we see fit, and see where things end up.

First, a few rules:

1. No random thread jumping*. If you want to get from Rutgers to Iran, you have to go Rutgers, New Jersey State University, New Jerseyans Love Fist Pumping, New Jerseyans pump fists not gas, Gas is refined oil, Iran's oil industry is basically just a front for their underground dance party circuit.
2. No personal attacks.
3. Okay, personal attacks are fine.

*unless you have a really good gif

Alright! On to the source material!

via upload.wikimedia.org (cc)

Rutgers: The State University of New Jersey

Founded: November 10th, 1766

Namesake: Revolutionary War Hero Colonel Henry Rutgers

Size: ~65,000

Hometown: New Brunswick, NJ

Land-Grant: You bet! Rutgers is a Colonial College, a State Flagship University and a Land Grant University (the only school in the nation able to boast all three designations).

Memberships: CIC, URA, AAU, APLU

Notable Faculty: Ruth Bader Ginsberg (Supreme Court Justice), David Levering Lewis (Pulitzer x2), Michael R Douglas (string theory), Jerry Alan Fodor (Guggenheim)

Notable Alumni: Milton Friedman (Nobel), Selman Waksman (Nobel), Robert Pinsky (Poet Laureate), Junot Diaz (Pulitzer), James Gandolfini (actor), Mario Batali (restaurateur), David Stern (NBA Commissioner), and ttfp's favorite, Louis Freeh (Director, FBI)

First Football Game Ever Played by Anyone: Won it

via www.youdontknowjersey.com (cc)

National Championships: 1 (1869)

B1G Since: 2014 (pending)

Previous Conference Affiliations: Middle States (1893-1894), Middle Three (1946-1951), Middle Atlantic (1958-1961), Big East (1991-2013), American (2013-2014), Big Ten (2014)

Nickname: Scarlet Knights

School Color: Scarlet (#FF3F00)

Mascot (Primary): Scarlet Knight (Infantry)

Mascot (Secondary): Scarlet Knight (Cavalry)

Mascot (Tertiary): Colonial Era Cannon (Artillery)

Rivals (All Sports): Princeton, Seton Hall, Columbia, Lehigh, Lafayette, NYU

Rivals (Basketball): Seton Hall (RU-SU is an awesome, knock-down, drag-out roundball series)

Rivals (Football): ttfp, Navy, Army, Syracuse, Connecticut, Maryland

Relevant Memes: Buttgers, WTfutgers, RU Screw, ttfp

Known For: Philosophy department (#3 in the English-speaking world after Oxford and Princeton), Business School & MBA program, grease trucks/fat sandwiches, women's basketball, being older than America, The Birthplace of College Football

So that's Rutgers, friends. Now, to the comments! I look forward to joining you on an adventure of off-topic buffoonery and loosely-associated adventures.

To infinity and beyond!

Monday: Cocktail Party Preview

Tuesday: Smartest Guy in the Room

Wednesday: Potluck Part One

Thursday: Potluck Part Two/Smoking Room **You are here**

Friday: Keeping the Enemy Close