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Just kidding, Purdue's not actually going bowling.

Jerry Lai-USA TODAY Sports

Hey, remember the 2013 edition of OTE #BOLDPREDICTIONS? That was fun! This year, we decided to see how many OTE writers we could get to say their borderline insane but possibly thought-out premonitions for the 2014 season.

What, you ask, is your job, humble OTE reader? Well, simple! The things we'd like you to do are threefold:

  1. Match the #BOLDPREDICTIONS to the provided OTE writers (not all 20 responded).
  2. Vote in the poll for best #BOLDPREDICTION
  3. Provide us with your own #BOLDPREDICTION in the comments! Feel free to go out on that limb you've always wanted to, but have just never worked up the courage to say! This is a safe (enough) space...

Choose from...

MNWildcat, DJ Carver, Jesse Collins, Graham Filler, Candystripes for Breakfast, Ray Ransom, Andrew Kraszewski, GoForTJ, C.E. Bell, Mike Jones, KC_HAWKEYE

Predictor #1:

  • Illinois will hire Pat Narduzzi at the end of the year
  • Indiana will win eight games this season
  • Iowa will lose only three games all year: Pitt, Maryland, Indiana
  • Maryland will not lose more than 12 combined starts all year on offense
  • Michigan will lose to Notre Dame on a controversial call that keeps the teams from renewing the series for two decades
  • Michigan State will beat Ohio State and lose to Maryland in consecutive weeks
  • Minnesota won't make a bowl game or win a rivalry trophy this season
  • Nebraska will go 9-3 in the regular season and lose to an SEC team in the Outback Bowl
  • Northwestern will go 6-6 and lose to Purdue
  • Ohio State will go 11-1 and not make the conference title game
  • Penn State will finish with a losing record
  • Purdue will not score more than six rushing touchdowns all season
  • Rutgers will go 2-10 and Kyle Flood will break down and cry after the Nebraska game
  • Wisconsin will go undefeated at home but not make it to Indianapolis.
  • Bonus: BTN will be owned by ESPN in the next calendar year.

Predictor #2

  • Indiana will have a major effect on the B1G East race without winning the division.
  • Northwestern will yet again disappoint, but will maintain ownership of the LOLHat.
  • One of Maryland or Rutgers will go bowling, and the other will finish last in the East.
  • Brady Hoke will not be coaching the Wolverines in 2015.
  • The winner of the B1G West will be known by the end of gamesNovember 22nd. That team will be Iowa.
  • PeLLLLini will continue.
  • Purdue will go 2-1 against teams from Illinois, but 1-2 against teams from Michigan.
  • No one will survive the conference season undefeated.
  • The Heisman winner will come from the Big Ten. It will not be an Ohio State Buckeye.

Predictor #3:

  • Ohio State will rush for more yards than Purdue, Indiana and Michigan combined.
  • Rutgers will beat one of these teams: Michigan, Michigan State, Nebraska or Wisconsin.
  • Christian Hackenberg will start a wildly successful sportscasting career early after breaking both legs vs. Rutgers.
  • Maryland's top 2 receivers will have more catches than Purdue's team.
  • Maryland and Rutgers will meet at the end of the season with both teams bowl eligible.
  • Rutgers and Maryland will be undefeated against border states.
  • Northwestern will increase the number of loses by hail mary by one.
  • Two teams from the Big Ten will be in the playoff. Neither will be Ohio State.
  • At least one coach will punch James Franklin in the face.

Predictor #4:

  • Rutgers has the highest single-game score of any conference team this season- in a loss to Washington State.
  • This season's first OTE game thread covering a Maryland game will feature no fewer than 15 mentions of Old Bay. None will be relevant. Maryland will make more money from the gate of the OSU and MSU games than all of last season's gate receipts combined, which will ease the disappointment of missing a bowl.
  • The All-Conference QBs will be Connor Cook, Nate Sudfeld, and Jake Rudock.
  • Wisconsin will not have a receiver with more than 500 yards or 4 TDs.
  • Randy Gregory and Shilique Calhoun will both be at least semifinalists for the Hendricks, Lombardi, and Bednarik trophies and will each be selected in the top ten of the 2015 NFL draft- both of them ahead of Brandon Scherff, who will fall (if you can call it that) to the late teens.
  • Tevin Coleman will lead the conference in rushing- and Indiana will still fail to make a bowl.
  • Nebraska will lose its noncon matchup with Miami due to a late sideline interference call when Bo's cat runs onto the field from the sideline during a kickoff return, but Miami's win will be vacated before the end of the season because obviously.
  • Northwestern will unveil an innovative new defensive formation called the Picket Line, which will consist of all 11 defensive players marching in shallow circles near the line of scrimmage. It will quickly be abandoned when their coaches realize it isn't an actual picket line and opposing receivers are simply going around it and finding themselves wide open.
  • Cardale Jones will struggle as Miller's replacement, quit the football team, and finish his academic career at OSU as a Rhodes scholar. After concluding his valedictory speech with the observation that he came to play school after all, he and Mike Sadler write a revolutionary new economics theorem explaining how Kirk Ferentz's contract is so easily rationalized by Iowa fans.




Predictor #5:

  • Indiana will beat Missouri but lose to Bowling Green in the non-con.
  • Nebraska will go 10-3, but will lose by 20+ to at least one opponent.
  • Michigan will start the season off 7-0, and will drop 4 out of their last 5.
  • OPOY will be a player from Indiana, and DPOY will be someone from Iowa
  • During the Nebraska-FAU game, announcers will mention 'Cat' at least seven times and Faux Pelini will have one viral tweet
  • The Big Ten will not have a team in the inaugural CFB Playoffs
  • Three loss Iowa wins the West, Two loss MSU wins the East, and everyone but B1G fans yawn
  • Illinois beats Northwestern with an interim coach
  • The B1G has three players finish with double-digit sacks: Randy Gregory, Shilique Calhoun, and Joey Bosa
  • Maryland-Rutgers becomes a trending topic on twitter during theirNov 29tilt when they introduce their new rivalry trophy - a B1G bowl, literally filled with millions of dollars
  • The B1G sends nine teams bowling with Indiana and Maryland sneaking into the last spots

Predictor #6:

  • The MSU readers on OTE will successfully carry out a bloodless coup against the OTE staff in November. The current writers will be sent to Bleacher Report to make graphs until they learn the error of their ways. OTE will become a Spartan site, home to articles like "Dantonio: God or Something Better?" and "An Oral History of 2012 Welcome Week, Cedar Village Apartment Unit #214" and "What is the Best Shade of Green?".

Predictor #7:

  • Mark Dantonio leaves MSU for Iowa, saying "if I'm going to be at a program that don't get no respect, at least I'ma go some place where I can do nothing and get paid, son."
  • Ohio State loses to Navy. By 5 points. Urban Meyer eats pizza alone in Bancroft Hall. Then reconsiders broadcasting
  • Braxton Miller retires from college football to write his memoirs, which is a coffee table book of childhood pictures from his family's trip to the glass museum in Toledo, grainy still shots from gifs of him running, 25 pages of comments selected at random from OTE, and a Papa John's/Donato's coupon book. Entitled "Won't Brax Down," it is a national best-seller.
  • Brady Hoke wins 9 games, gets a contract extension that makes Kirk Ferentz jealous. Ohio State considers the season a success as a result.
  • Purdue doesn't convert a third down until their second B1G game, and that happens on a penalty.
  • Tim Beckman wins B1G COTY.
  • Narduzzi accepts the coaching vacancy at Maryland.
  • Bo Pelini's eyeball pops out of its socket ever so briefly during a sideline tirade. In the first quarter of week one.
  • Purdue is asked to consider joining the MAC. Then joins the MAC.

Predictor #8:

  • ​Minnesota will claim at least one rivalry trophy.
  • Wisconsin will not finish the year with double-digit wins.
  • Michigan State will be out of the CFB playoff race by early November.
  • Only the winner of Rutgers-Maryland will go bowling. The loser will be 5-7.
  • Purdue will win the Bucket and ruin Indiana's shot at bowling. Kevin Wilson's seat gets warm.
  • Ohio State: National Runners-Up
  • Nebraska will lose at Fresno State, bringing another season of 9-4.
  • Illinois will fire Tim Beckman before season's end.
  • Trevor Siemian will lead the Big Ten in completion percentage.
  • Stefon Diggs will not catch 10 TD passes.
  • Penn State will drop at least one non-conference game.
  • Iowa, on a tiebreaker, will represent the West in Indianapolis. It will not end well.

Predictor #9:

  • Northwestern only goes 6-6 but still beats Iowa so it's a successful season for Fat Fitzgerald.
  • Joel Stave is exposed for the candyass he is and has a season that Kevin Kolb thinks is terrible.
  • Indiana puts up 500 yards in their win at Rutgers.
  • Ohio State doesn't win double digit games.
  • Illinois goes winless in conference.
  • So does Rutgers. #Buttgers
  • Speaking of Rutgers, Mike Leach puts 40 points on them.
  • The Big Ten has a losing record onSeptember 13th.
  • Iowa goes to the Rose Bowl. <---- SO BOLD I NEED A BAJA BLAST MOUNTAIN DEW
  • Oh, I forgot Nebraska. Yeah, Nebraska goes 8-4. Somehow.

Predictor #10:

  • Ohio State loses at least three games this year....including THE Game. Braxton Miller announces that he'll come back in 2015, though.
  • Michigan State runs the table in the regular season (including at Oregon), wins the B1G Title game, and wins a College Football Semifinal game. Shilique Calhoun wins National Defensive POY.
  • Wisconsin loses 4-5 games (including to LSU), and gives up 27+ points per game in B1G play.
  • Northwestern's Trevor Siemian leads all B1G QBs in passing yards, completions, and completion percentage, but misses out on All-B1G QB in favor of Connor Cook.
  • Northwestern's Ifeadi Odenigbo and Dean Lowry combine for more sacks than any other 2 B1G teammates.
  • Iowa wins the B1G West (albeit with losing 1-2 games in regular season), and ends up the B1G's Rose Bowl rep (since MSU is in the playoffs).
  • Nebraska's Ameer Abdullah scores over 20 TDs.
  • Penn State finishes the season no better than 6-6.
  • Indiana makes a bowl game, and WINS that bowl game by at least 2 TDs.
  • Illinois wins only two games in the B1G, but they're both insanely high scoring games that go to OT against Purdue and Penn State. No bowl for 5-7 Illini. Bye bye Beckman, who is fired BEFORE the LOLHat game.
  • Maryland goes bowling, but loses in embarrassing fashion to Rutgers to give the Scarlett Knights their lone B1G win of the season.
  • Minnesota flounders a bit to a 4-8 record, but Mitch Leidner leads the B1G QBs in rushing yards.
  • Michigan wins the Game, but finishes 4th in the B1G West regardless.
  • Purdue goes winless in the B1G.....but Hazell stays, after the team takes 3 B1G games to OT, including the Battle for the Old Oaken Bucket against Indiana.

Predictor #11:

  • Penn State finishes no better than fifth in the B1G East
  • Nebraska sweeps the West, going 11-1 en route to a conference championship game against their only loss, MSU
  • Purdue wins five games
  • Illinois does the impossible and gets the illibuck trophy back