It's Week 3, and the fun stat that the world is throwing around is the fact that the MAC certainly has more P5 wins over the B1G. Then again, so does everyone... And I'm pretty sure that wins over Purdue don't count. Or shouldn't count. Or something... Ok, let's get on with it. For Part I of this week's B1G-MAC swap, head on over to Hustle Belt. Or, if you don't care about who I sent down to the MAC (spoiler: Goldy is going to be aaaaaangry), stay here and talk about overreactions to moral victories. Yeah, B1G-MAC SWAP WEEK 3 TIME!
Jesse: Let's get this thing reversed. Who do we have coming to the Big Ten? Can we add somebody who can beat a Power 5 team? PLEEEEEASE?!?!
Bryan: How about a team that can blow games vs. Power 5 teams in epic fashion? Listen, what's a good sports piece without HOT SPORTS TAKES? And what's a good HOT SPORTS TAKE without wild overreaction? That's why, for the only time in the history of ever, I'm giving the B1G....UMASS!!!!!!!
Jesse: HAHAHAHAHAHA! Seriously, if only our readers could see this happen in real time like we're typing. I literally laughed when you said that, but proceed. I look forward to a Vandy joke in a moment.
Bryan: Laugh all you want, but UMass has come closer to beating a pair of P5 teams then about 95 percent of the B1G. I DON'T CARE IF IT WAS COLORADO IN BUFFALO! THAT'S WHAT Y'ALL GET FOR CONSIDERING THEM P5 TEAMS!
Also, UMass is looking for a new home, and we all know the B1G actually wants to be a basketball conference. The Minutemen are pretty good at hoops, and epic at losing in awkward ways, which is sure to keep the B1G more relevant in ESPN's discussions of "has the B1G crumbled?". So Mark Whipple and his merry band of misfits, you're going to the B1G!
Jesse: This is what non-con has done to us Bryan. Look what you've done. Well here's the deal, I can objectively say that UMass would probably be on Delany's radar if it promised to give us the entire Boston market, so be careful what you're doing here. Before you know it, we're going to have Rutgers fans calling UMass "That Team from Some Other State That's Not Ours" and we'll all kind of look at them weird.
Bryan: Let me interject real quick Jesse. Another reason behind this decision is Jim Delany's MANIFEST DESTINY HARD-ON for the East Coast. I don't care what UMass fans say, they're from Boston for the purposes of us getting rid of them. So yes, you get the whole Boston Market (including some delicious meatloaf).
Jesse: Hey, I love me some Boston Market, and I can't say that we're totally against this move from a money standpoint. Hell, if we're going to go down this sad road of expansion, might as well cash the checks. That being said, I just don't know how UMass is going to do in the Big Ten, especially because you know we're realigning to add them and that means some fancypants B1G-East schedules.
I think UMass has showed they can play with really really bottom tier teams. Does that mean I think they could play with/beat Purdue? Yes. How about Northwestern? This year? Yes. Illinois? Probably, but that defense needs to do something about Wes Lunt. Indiana? Maybe. Minnesota (yeah yeah, Minnesota is better than these other teams, but this is the format. Deal with it Gopher fans)? Probably not.
So UMass goes to the bottom two or three and probably ends up losing in some spectacular fashion to everyone. On an upside, our new friends out East have a new team to destroy and a stadium to make fun of.
Bryan: No, you get Gillette Stadium with this deal. So the only thing you'll be laughing about is the 40k empty seats on Saturdays.
Jesse: I think Northwestern has a tarp they could lend them... Anyhow, so there we have it. We give you Minnesota, we get back UMass, I'm beginning to wonder if perhaps we have switched the promotion/relegation angle and just don't know it yet... Oh well, onto Week 4. One more week for the B1G to embarrass itself! Fun... Hope the MAC can finish out better than we do.
Bryan: BONUS! UMass just fired its special teams coordinator because its kicker missed so bad that a Vanderbilt defensive lineman had to give him a hug at the end of the game. Y'all like special teams play? Wait till you see UMass play special teams. It'll blow your mind.
Jesse: Hey, we like our Special Teams here. Kirk Ferentz guffaws at the idea of someone not knowing how to handle such things. Oh... Man, UMass might fit in after all.
Bryan: See, I know what I'm doing. You all will thank me later. Happy UMass day!