Hello! Did you all get what you wanted for Christmas? I hope so!* Now that you're picking over the remnants of yesterday's Christmas ham, prime rib, or pickled herring (mmm), settle onto the couch for a day chock-full of sportsball, starting...well, already!
*Does not apply to Mike Jones
Of B1G Interest
Pinstripe Bowl: Indiana (-3) vs. Duke || 2:30pm CT, ABC
As you've no doubt heard, it's football played by basketball teams on a baseball field. And that, my friends, is appointment goddamn television. Let the kids play with their new toys in the living room; retreat to your mancave and watch the hell out of this one. Read Candystripes' preview for your breakdown and thoughts!
Prediction: Indiana, 38-30
Foster Farms Bowl: Nebraska (+5.5) vs. UCLA || 8:30pm, ESPN
Can 5-7 Nebraska do it? Can they earn their 8th loss in a bowl gathering a little reputation for taking on 7-loss teams? I don't know...read Jesse's preview and you tell me! Regardless, 8:15 in God's Time is perfect for those last couple beers at the end of a long day. Getting to watch Nebraska get hamblasted? Doubly worth it.
Prediction: UCLA, 34-21.
Of Bowl Interest
St. Petersburg Bowl: UConn vs. Marshall (-3) || 10am, ESPN
Hurry! Change the channel! You're late! It's UConn-Marshall, and no one cares, but the kids are quiet and God bless you, you deserve this one.
Prediction: Marshall, 30-20.
Hyundai Sun Bowl: Miami-FL vs. Washington State (-2.5) || 1pm, CBS
Dread Pirate Leach goes to El Paso. Odds he is in cahoots with at least two cartels in the Juarez area? I'd give it about 2-to-1.
Prediction: Wazzu, 41-31.
Zaxby's Heart of Dallas Bowl: Washington (-8) vs. Southern Mississippi || 1:20pm, ESPN
That's right, 6-6 Washington is favored by more than a touchdown over the 9-4 Golden Eagles. Oh, and Raising Cane's is better than Zaxby's. #hottaek
Prediction: Washington, 27-13.
Camping World Independence Bowl: Tulsa vs. Virginia Tech (-14) || 4:45pm, ESPN
MINUS-14. THAT IS THE LINE IN A BOWL GAME. Christ. Don't watch this. Just assume Frank Beamer won and rode off into the sunset in a new RV from Camping World (I assume that's what they sell there).
Prediction: Beamerball, 35-17.
Of Squeakyfouls Interest
#16 Louisville at #12 Kentucky (-3) || 11am, CBS
The state of Kentucky will burn on Boxing Day as Kentucky looks to put a loss to Ohio State far, far in the rearview by defending its home floor against the Cardinals.
Prediction: I do not watch.
Of Kicks-and-Falls Interest
STK 2-0 MUN
LIV 1-0 LEI
CHE 2-2 WAT
AVL 1-1 WHU goddamnit I don't want to talk about it.
BOU 0-0 CRY
MCI 4-1 SUN
SWA 1-0 WBA
TOT 3-0 NOR
Newcastle vs Everton || 11:30am, NBCSN
Prediction: Everton, 2-0
Southampton vs. Arsenal || 1:45pm, NBCSN
Can Arsenal tie Leicester atop the table with an away win against the Saints? Seems like Arsene Wenger has the Gunners coming into form at a nice time, especially if the Foxes can't keep their miraculous run up, having now dropped their first match in 11.
Prediction: Arsenal, 1-0
Proceed making fun of me for including soccer on the open thread.
In the meantime, happy thread! Usual rules apply: No porn, no illegal streams, don't be a jackwagon. Let's all just sit back and laugh at Nebraska.