The thin skin of Tim Beckman

Coach Beckman,

You don't know me, but we have met in passing once, online. Back in October, Gwyneth Paltrow made a stupid comment about President Obama that generated a twitter meme with the hashtag #GwynethPaltrowIsMoreUselessThan . On a friday night in October I decided to join in on the action:

#GwynethPaltrowIsMoreUselessThan @coachbeckman and @RonZook combined

— LincolnPark Wildcat (@LPWildcat) October 11, 2014

You later blocked me from following you on twitter because of that tweet. That's ok, I'm just a fan of your archrival making fun of you and your predecessor, and I really could care less.

However, you have continued to be a poor football coach at Illinois, racking up a 12-25 record overall and 4-20 in the Big Ten over three seasons.

And now you're worried about what your recruits are reading from the local media!

Here's the latest from the Chicago Tribune:

What are (recruits) reading?’’ Beckman asked reporters. "What are you saying? . . . The challenge is still, how important is the University of Illinois to you? It’s very important to us. We can be successful if we’re all in this together.’’

...

"Let's build this thing into a champion," he said, addressing reporters. "The more positive stuff you can talk about the better off we all are."

He "challenged" the media the same way after beating Northwestern in the regular-season finale.

And the other headlines haven't been pretty either:

CBS Chicago: The Bernstein Brief: Tim Beckman Needs Help

Dr. Saturday on Yahoo: Tim Beckman wants the media to be more positive about his program

Eleven Warriors: Tim Beckman demands media start producing propaganda

Wow.. Not good.

Tim, you even want the media to aid you in recruiting by writing nice things, explaining, "We’re all in this together."

Tim, let me set you straight: You coach at Illinois. You can't have nice things!

UPDATE: Your 4-star quarterback is transferring!

*Yes, I know you defeated Northwestern last year and have the hat... I'll talk more about that later.

The job of the media is to sell ads and draw in an audience by whatever means necessary. If you're good at football like your old boss at Bowling Green Urban Meyer, then you'll get good press.  And that could be a nice thing.

Also, every once in a while it is possible for Illinois to be good at football, it happens twice a decade. In 2007 Illinois defeated #1 Ohio State in Columbus, took home the Turtle, and went to the Rose Bowl. My best friend and roommate and Illinois grad was so excited about beating OSU that he ran down the street to an OSU bar and almost got his ass kicked taunting the remaining OSU fans in the bar. I had to intervene! The next day I saw a ton of Orange around Lincoln Park when people were walking to sunday brunch.

If you're having problems recruiting kids then I've got a few pieces of advice for you:

Tell them, do you want to play for Ohio State or beat them? Tell them "wouldn't it be better for you to build a program?". Or something. I'm not a coach. I'm just a Northwestern fan who is incredulous at how you're dealing with the media. And I want the damn hat back!

Sincerely,

LincolnParkWildcat

PS: