GREETINGS LOYAL SUBJECTS OF THE EMPIRE.

WE NEED TO TALK.

There is only one more football game before we’re all flung into the abyss.

The New England Patriots will take on the Atlanta Falcons in Houston for the NFL title in Super Bowl 51. One last chance to take in football until seven months of frigid wilderness. Let’s talk it out.

B1G Players in the Super Bowl

Illinois: New England G Ted Karras

Indiana: Atlanta RB Tevin Coleman

Iowa: Atlanta DT Jonathan Babineaux

Maryland: New England DT Joe Villano

Michigan: New England QB Tom Brady, DL Allan Branch

Michigan State: None

Minnesota: Atlanta LB De’Vondre Campbell, DT Ra’Shede Hageman

Nebraska: New England DT Vincent Valentine

Northwestern: None

Ohio State: New England DB Nate Ebner

Penn State: None

Purdue: Atlanta S Ricardo Allen, New England LB Rob Ninkovich

Rutgers: Atlanta WR Mohammed Sanu, New England DB Duron Harmon, DB Devin McCourty, CB Logan Ryan

Wisconsin: New England RB James White

Total: 17

Game Info: 6:30ET on FOX

Thumpasaurus Drinking Game

Drink one when the following is mentioned:

-A Big Ten player

-Deflating/Ballghazi

-Rob Gronkowski

-Dirty Bird

-24: Legacy

Drink one when a white player on the Patriots is described with typical words such as “gritty,” “deceptively fast,” “high football IQ guy,” “Wes Welker type” or anything similar

Waterfall during a Joe Buck “it iiiiiiissssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss..........”

Drink two for:

-Lacrosse

-Aaron Rodgers

-Donald Trump

-An ad actually makes you laugh out loud

-A missed extra point

Finish your drink for:

-Any mention of Brett Favre

-A safety

-Any current or former Big Ten head coach is mentioned

-Profanity on live TV, whether it be audible or lip-read

Chug an entire beer for:

-Any mention of the burning of Atlanta

-”Houston we have a problem”

-Televised nudity