Welcome to week three of the Meltdown Index, and this week brings a veritable bounty of cringe inducing losses all over the South.

Nebraska loses to Northern Illinois.

My colleague Thumpasaurus was quite prescient last week in his infographics:

because it’s dicktrip o’clock for the Huskers! AHAHAHA!!!

Let’s check in with our friends over at CornNation

Bring back Cosgrove

This way the Callahan Redux experiment will be complete.

Posted by MiamiHusker91 on Sep 16, 2017 | 3:40 PM reply rec (1) flag

Have Kevin Cosgrove and Bob Diaco ever been seen together?

We suck!

There is simply no excuse no matter how well prepared NIU was.

Posted by matrixman40 on Sep 16, 2017 | 2:24 PM reply rec (3) flag

Are we sure Mike Riley isn’t just coasting until retirement? Would you guys be doing better under an up and comer like Scott Frost?

Lol

We outmatched NIU at every position on the field from a talent perspective. They are a MAC team. We are a Big 10 team (or at least, we pretend to be). This loss had nothing to do with talent and had everything to do with coaching, playcalling, motivation, confidence, and execution. The whole thing is broken. From here this thing is either going to fall apart completely or we will just be incredibly mediocre.

Follow @HuskerGrip

Posted by Billgrip on Sep 16, 2017 | 2:30 PM up reply rec (22) flag

Congrats! You’re now a true Big Ten team dicktripping against the MAC!

Eichorst has got to go.

He is an incompetent narcissist. Did you watch his 9 minute press meeting? I did. He exhibited all the signs of a narcissist and threw his director of communications under the bus and then talked about all the good he (SE) has done. The guy is a fucking clown. He was a shit hire by HP and he hired Mr. Rogers to be our coach. I’m beyond disgusted.

To Ferentz – verb – to lock yourself into a comfortable, if unspectacular situation out of fear of the consequences from change. To dump a disproportionate truckload of money on something relative to the return on investment.

Posted by atomiclawnchair

Posted by _Sandman_ on Sep 16, 2017 | 2:45 PM up reply rec (10) flag

Shawn Eichorst had better watch out for the children of the corn (I can’t resist, sometimes these jokes write themselves) with pitchforks and torches now!!! AHHH!!!

You are right, looking like the Callahan years all over again.

Time to stop the bleeding and fire Riley and staff and especially Eichorst who brought him to NU.Because this team is an EMBARRASSMENT to even the Callahan teams.

Posted by jdkone on Sep 16, 2017 | 5:00 PM up reply rec flag

Ouch!

Behind the practice field

Posted by CornyJovet on Sep 16, 2017 | 3:15 PM up reply rec (5) flag

A picture says 1000 words.

LSU loses by 30 to Mississippi State!

Let’s check in with our friends at And the Valley Shook

Let's ask this guy how the game went

#DiddlyPoo

Reigning HAWT TAEK Champion

Posted by SaveFarris on Sep 17, 2017 | 6:35 AM reply rec (2) flag

Nice! Gotta appreciate a good Mora rant

Couldn't run the ball. Couldn't throw the ball. Everytime they got the ball they went down and got points

You guessed it.

Posted by Frank Stallone on Sep 17, 2017 | 9:28 AM up reply rec (1) flag

Coach, do you think Arden Key is going to be back to 100% by the playoffs?

Posted by Deadpool's Gun on Sep 17, 2017 | 11:23 AM up reply rec flag

PLAYOFFS? PLAYOFFS???

Are you kiddin’ me?!?

Posted by jrnail23 on Sep 17, 2017 | 11:57 AM up reply rec (1) flag

Mizzou loses to Purdue

Let’s check in with our friends at Rock M Nation

So where are we on the drunk scale?

I’m at about a 7.5. Definitely ready for basketball.

Posted by MUTigersFAn on Sep 16, 2017 | 6:03 PM reply rec flag

Go drink Malort. It’ll help you drink faster.

can't belive we are just now getting to the 4th quarter

Bataan Death March.

Posted by joedog3 on Sep 16, 2017 | 5:35 PM reply rec flag

Ouch!

Does this offense have a 90 yd driv..............

I’m drunk!

Posted by 1Believer on Sep 16, 2017 | 5:18 PM reply rec flag

Losing to Purdue will do that to anyone

There is no coming back from this.

I’m talking the whole season. This team has given up on the coaching and I can’t say I blame them. I had, what I thought, were reasonable expectations for the year given returning starters. Obviously, the fans not in the stands saw it before me.

It’s a shame. This school deserves better.

Posted by Earl Billings on Sep 16, 2017 | 5:32 PM reply rec (5) flag

This team is unmotivated and directionless.

Those things were obvious in the first half. Some of these guys are very talented – they deserve better. Recruiting is going to be completely in the toilet.

Posted by GreenChileMizzou on Sep 16, 2017 | 9:26 PM reply rec flag

Awww... Go play the world’s smallest violin.

Announcement:

Meditation, yoga, and other activities requiring quiet and privacy will now be available at Faurot Field during Mizzou football games. Mizzou athletics further announces plan to start renting yoga mats and begin playing classical music and waterfall sounds over the PAs. The Mizzou secondary will lead these sessions, due to their gentle nature and noble unwillingness to take any action that could cause harm to another human or opposing football player. Barry Odom had originally been tapped for the job, but his time management skills unfortunately were not quite adequate for keeping the stopwatch.

Drew Lock will also not participate, due to throwing his yoga mat 20 yards past the target location.

Cheering for Mizzou this week against Purdue. Don't let that username fool you

Posted by mizzouboiler on Sep 16, 2017 | 6:48 PM reply rec (8) flag

Louisville loses to Clemson

Let’s check in with our friends at Card Chronicle.

Well guys, it'll be nice playing "no name school here" in the Camping Papa John's Dominos Walmart McDonald's Incrdible Awesome bowl this season

by UOFLfan7 on Sep 16, 2017 | 10:37 PM reply

Whoa, whoa, whoa...slow down...

we still have to win enough games to get to the Camping Papa John’s Dominos Walmart McDonald’s Incrdible Awesome bowl.

by Corvin331 on Sep 16, 2017 | 10:39 PM up reply

Good point

I may be being too optimistic

by UOFLfan7 on Sep 16, 2017 | 10:49 PM up reply

HAHAHAHAHA!!! At the rate of Bowl Game expansion, Wal-Mart probably will sponsor a game.

What the fuck has Sirmon done to our defense?

We used to have some pride.

by RedCosmic on Sep 16, 2017 | 10:34 PM reply

He completely fucked us

by UOFLfan7 on Sep 16, 2017 | 10:35 PM up reply

Fire Sirmon, hire Carolina

Hell, fire Sirmon, hire ANYBODY

by UOFLfan7 on Sep 16, 2017 | 10:50 PM reply

I'm submitting resume' tomorrow

by RMacfan1 on Sep 16, 2017 | 10:54 PM up reply

How about the Prince of Punts himself?

EDSBS

Baylor loses to Duke

Let’s check in again with our friends at Our Daily Bears

I vacillate between thinking "this offensive system sucks" and "our offensive line would make any system suck."

I have no real idea.

Posted by Aqua on Sep 16, 2017 | 3:08 PM reply rec (1) flag

Sorry, not even RG3 could save this crappy excuse for a team.

time to admit the inevitable

this season is done as of today Sept 16. BU will end the season at 0-12. The remaining Big 12 teams are vastly superior than the first 3 teams. Today, BU will begin training for 2018-19 season.

Posted by LAbaylorfan on Sep 16, 2017 | 3:58 PM reply rec (1) flag

Have you watched Kansas play at all this season?

What about Iowa State?

Posted by Aqua on Sep 16, 2017 | 4:03 PM up reply rec (6) flag

Ow!! GET READY TO LOSE TO IOWA STATE!

Hat Tip from SBNation’s TWIS, this was too good to pass up.

Hey all-

Let's be realistic here. We have ZERO depth and we will lose a lot of commitments with this horrible start. This "process" will take us until the mid to late 2020s to get close to decent.

How long will the big 12 put up with it? Admit it, we got very lucky to get in. We better be on the look out.

p.s. Anyone that does not think we got luck to get in the big 12 ask any other big 12 fan (not a baylor fan).

I sure wish I was wrong

lawmaker 6:43p, 9/16/17

Didn’t you guys get into the Big 12 because of politics and not merit on the football field?

Tennessee loses to Florida.

Let’s check in with our friends at Rocky Top Talk

I think Jones should spend a few days in that trash can....

Posted by Steve Falin on Sep 16, 2017 | 6:29 PM reply rec (7) flag

While you’re at it, throw that gawdawful checkerboard pattern in the trash too.

Seen Enough

It’s time to send Coach Flat-top packing.

Posted by VW Beetle on Sep 16, 2017 | 6:23 PM reply rec flag

at the very least Shoop has 100% got to go.

Posted by Kenny Massey on Sep 16, 2017 | 6:25 PM up reply rec (1) flag

You have the brother of the worst offensive coordinator in Chicago Bears history as your DC. Football mediocrity runs in that family. You deserve all the mockery.

"I was hired to beat Florida" *

Posted by 100%Humidity on Sep 16, 2017 | 6:17 PM reply rec flag

Get shoop the fuck out of here.

Posted by Kenny Massey on Sep 16, 2017 | 6:18 PM up reply rec flag

Bears and Purdue Boilermaker fans agree, coaches named Shoop do not deserve to be anywhere near a football field

That's possibly the most Tennessee way to lose a football game.

Posted by choplakecity on Sep 16, 2017 | 6:12 PM reply rec (5) flag

HAHHAHAHAHA

Irrelevant and an Embarressment????

I get your --ed off and upset about another garbage loss, but please don’t refer to our football program as irrelevant and an embarrassment. That’s a bit much.

Posted by Jan221973 on Sep 17, 2017 | 3:11 PM reply rec flag

Sorry...

I meant nationally irrelevant and an embarrassment to defend. Like I said, this team has some great players but we’re dumb in the coaches box. We brought a garbage can onto our sideline. A garbage can. Embarrassing.

Posted by WildcatVol on Sep 17, 2017 | 3:40 PM up reply rec flag

WTF is up with a garbage can on the sideline?

I was a BOOSTER

I am a Tennessean and I have worked all my life. My children have finally grown, my second graduated from the University of Tennessee. I am proud and have had seats at the 48 yard line on the aisle on row 58, you lean over and look down midfield. Six rows up is the concession area and bathrooms. My seats were covered with monitors to my left and right. My children and grandchildren went to games. I GAVE MY SEATS UP BECAUSEOF JONES INCOMPETENCE !!! I could not watch him clueless coach another game. His talking bologna was enough but I could just not listen. I want to like Coach Jones, I want him to win, I don’t want another coaching search. But he is horrible in every aspect of the word except recruiting where he is excellent, why ? Because he talks smack and knows how to manipulate people with his BS. I miss my tickets, my seats, my children miss them. I live and die Tennessee football and have since Coach Battle was coaching. I do not care about any other sport. This is a big deal to me personally. You cannot tell me there is not a High school coach in this state who could not have prepared and organized and had a better game plan than this. And his coaching strategy, game management, my goodness, no under center snaps for a play at the 8 inch line. I can’t take this anymore. AND……… Jimmy Hyams and Bro. Gov, and a few more TOP LEVEL controllers of this program the last 40 years are responsible for all of it. From the firing and the way they handled Coach Fulmer, to Kiffin, to Hamilton, to saying Bill Battle was not experienced enough for our AD job (true or false ?) to stabbing Dooley in the back, hiring the 5th choice Jones because 4 others turned us down. WHY, because they know of these ALUM who control it all like a bad movie

Joel R. Anthony Jr.

Posted by Voldomination on Sep 17, 2017 | 11:12 AM reply rec flag

Morgan State gets shut out by Rutgers

I couldn’t find a Morgan State board, but this image will do: