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Where We Be, What We Be Drinking: Week 6

Our weekly tour around the country to see how our “writers” will be enjoying football season

Happy friday everyone, and welcome to another edition ow WWBWWBD, the weekly segment where your friendly OTE editorial staff pretends that they’ll have fun watching Rutgers and Illinois bat at each other like kittens, rather than watching in horror as Ohio State punches Indiana in the throat with ghost of Woody Hayes’ fist.

This week we’ve got dinosaurs, birthday cake, and Foo Fighters to entertain us, so let’s go around the country and see what everyone is doing tomorrow. I’ll go first:

I’ll be at home. Don’t yet know what I’ll be making to eat, but I’ll be avoiding pork products so as not to upset Floyd. For libations I’ve got a fridge full of Alewerks Pumpkin Ale and a nice bottle of Dia de los Muertos from Adroit Theory brewing. It’s a delicious stout made with Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee, hazelnuts, and bourbon aged honey. YUM!

I’ll be in Central Nevada looking at rocks and ichthyosaur fossils and probably getting drunk with a subset of USC geology grad students. I actually want to be able to watch the game, but I’m not sure what the service is like out there. It ain’t Vegas...

I’ll be in East Lansing this weekend, and am looking forward to drinking local craft beer and exploring MSU’s campus.

Boiler bye week, home, hopefully napping.

Candystripes For Breakfast
Since for some reason IU’s game this week merits an appearance on actual Fox (hint: it’s because OSU is playing), I’ll be home by game time. Sorrows will likely be drowned in Vanilla Coke, because let’s be honest: this is almost certainly going to go badly.

Bye Week! That means fishing, surfing and bbq. I’ll be searching the island for the best Octoberfest I can find. Last week I was highly disappointed in a locally brewed Octoberfest. Tasted like budweiser with caramel coloring.

I will be in Lincoln, watching the #3 Huskers take on the #5 Gophers--I’m talking about volleyball, of course! Nebraska may lose this match, but it should be a lot of fun and feature a ton of phenomenal play, unlike what I suspect will be going down in Madison.

I’ll be on the road again this weekend, not attending a football game, but escaping to the high dessert for a weekend of hikes and Dave Grohl. Camelback, Pinnacle Peak and the Foo Fighters await me in Phoenix ... as does Four Peaks Brewery. I trust Michigan can take care of business without me for one weekend.

Arthur Aardvarvski
Despite a forecast resolutely predicting thunderstorms and my certainty that this game is going to make me tear my hair out, I will be present at Spartan Stadium for homecoming. It’s apple pie week. We all gon’ die.

I’ll be just outside of Hagerstown, MD celebrating my father’s 80th birthday on Saturday. I’ll be drinking whatever I pick up at the liquor store for the birthday party.

I’ll either be in Greensboro or Danville, drinking some generic label pumpkin ale, and getting ready for this p-i-t-a trial that starts Monday. JUST GIVE US YOUR MONEY ALREADY, INSURANCE COMPANY

My family and a bunch of friends from my hometown are doing a big tailgate for Iowa-Minnesota, so...why the hell not?! Beats watching the second half of Northwestern-Michigan State.

I know a big crock of buffalo chicken dip will be present at the tailgate, along with various grilled meats and a shitton of Mich Golden Light. For a 40-degree morning in the beautiful Twin Cities, I think that’s all I need.

Then the wife and I will head over to St Paul on the light rail -- she’s got packet pickup for the TC 10-Mile on Sunday, and we’re meeting a few friends at the Minnesota Wild’s Hocktoberfest block party. Should be a fun, boozy day.

I will be spending my day at and around HISTORIC TCF Bank Stadium for the showdown for Floyd of Rosedale. With the forecast calling for a crisp, perfect autumn afternoon, I’ll be enjoying a few Surly Coffee Benders and a few Grain Belt Nordeasts with friends while discussing the viability of trying to play Australian Rules Football next spring.

I’ll be at a wedding all day in Paxton, IL drinking whatever is at the bar.

Now that you know where to find your “writers”, what about the rest of you? Are you trying to quantum leap into James Franklin’s body so you can make better play calls for him? Are you using interdimensional cable to watch the Hawaii game without having to stay up for the midnight kickoff? As usual, LET US KNOW IN THE COMMENTS!