With basketball coming to its inevitable end, it’s time to fire up the ol’ article generation machine and... LOOK AT THAT!
Yes, it’s time for the 2018 Big Ten Spring Positional Rankings which is exactly as the name implies. A little history lesson for you all. I started this series back in 2013 under the premise that we would pick the five or so best players at each position. That first piece featured Braxton Miller, Taylor Martinez, Kain Colter, Devin Gardner, and the Indiana cohort. If history has taught us anything, it’s that the Big Ten QB situation has always been a little iffy.
Fun fact, the “The writers don’t even watch football” meme started in that article officially, so that was fun. Oh, and “Spring-ing to the Top” has got to be the worst name for a series ever. It was eventually killed for the slightly less cringe-inducing, “Spring Fling”, and then morphed into the SEO-friendly “Big Ten Spring Positional Rankings” that we have today.
I don’t need to really go too deep into the way these articles go down, but I will tell you that we are trying to get more scientific in our approach. There will be votes and maybe even transparency and everything. I mean, it’s like this site grew up after I stopped writing incessantly. I’m sure there is no correlation at all... Uh, let’s not ever look back at all the articles I’ve written on this site. Nobody needs that.
As is tradition, let’s go ahead and answer a few questions from the peanut gallery**.
Jesse, what the hell happened to your team last year?
Funny you should ask imaginary person! Let’s go ahead and see who our top picks were in the Spring of 2017:
Look, none of those are terrible picks per say, but uh, not seeing Saquon feels juuuust a little off in hindsight. For the record, I do not claim any responsibility for anything.
Jesse, have you and/or your team members became less idiotic?
Like in general? Because no... Hard. No. In fact, the opposite has probably happened, but I do believe we accidentally hired on team members that actually watch football, so that’s fun. In other news, this seems like a fun space to update everyone on my child who at this time last year was just learning to walk. She now just walks around bossing me around and vacillating wildly between telling me to “go away” and telling me that she loves me. Toddlers are basically football fans when thinking about their head coaches.
Jesse, what is the schedule?
All of your questions are amazing. The schedule this year is sort of in flux, but expect daily articles while we sort of space out of/pretend we care about the NCAA tournament. I might add that we are also adding head coach this year, so that will be fun. Know who isn’t the best coach in the Big Ten yet? Jim Harbaugh, but also Scott Frost for the same reason Harbaugh probably shouldn’t have been throned as the next big thing. Sometimes these things take time and hype is just hype. Weird, no?
Jesse, is there a Jabrill Peppers player this year?
Probably not. I still don’t know if the Big Ten, two years removed from his greatness, can handle having someone who dominates every position like him. Also, looking at last year’s list, there just doesn’t seem to be anything that matched the absurdity. I do think we annoyed Iowa last year. I assume that tradition will be kept alive.
Okay, last question Jesse. Are you still bitter Nebraska didn’t make the NCAA Tournament?
No, I’m bitter they are a 5 seed in the NIT tournament.
Alright friends, thanks again for playing as always. Look forward to discussing football with you all and arguing about why another 5* recruit from Ohio State isn’t the top x on this list.