Happy Friday, and welcome back to football! This is Where We Be, What We Be Drinking: the weekly segment where yourOTE staff takes a break from the fast paced (slow paced) world of sports blogging (our day jobs) to humblebrag about how amazing our lives are (quantify how drunk we intend to get).
I’ll be honest, there are way too many bye weeks going on right now. In fact there’s only one ranked B1G team playing tomorrow, and it’s the one featuring Josh Gattis’ dogass offense. I’ll try to entertain myself by rooting for Illinois I guess, because it will be fun as hell if they can somehow reach bowl eligibility (something I thought was less likely than them finishing 2-10 justs two weeks ago).
Alright, lets see what everyone is up to:
I’ll be taking the wife and twins out to brunch at Three Notch’d brewery before coming home and relaxing for the rest of the day. With all the bye weeks I’ll be squandering an excellent chance to be productive when I choose to instead play Luigi’s Mansion 3 all weekend.
I’ll be at home in Chicago, wishing I brought Mediterranean weather back with me. I’ll find my way to the local liquor store and stock up on Italian beer and a few Half Acre daisy cutters while I watch Northwestern flounder against the Hoosiers.
I’m traveling to West Lafayette to sit in semi-freezing cold weather to watch the Boilers hopefully not lay an egg against Nebraska. The beverage of choice will be Miller Lite from the bread truck kegerator or something brought in by one of the other faithful. I’ll be watching in a hoodie. Hopefully Scott Frost understands.
Huh, Indiana-Northwestern kicks off at...wait, why? WHY? Why would you need to play this at night, where people might accidentally see it on FS1 and not tune in to North Texas-Charlotte or something?
Anywho, the wife has a birthday coming up soon, and this marks the sixth year running that she and a friend from undergraduate have done a joint birthday party (we are adults, I swear).
This year, since she works, we’re not starting until later, then doing a small brewery/restaurant tour (we’re older now so we definitely don’t call it a crawl) of Northeast Minneapolis. So I’ll be somewhere between Fair State Brewing Cooperative (which I own!) and Broken Clock Brewing Cooperative (of which I am not currently a member), enjoying a number of excellent sours and perhaps the Fair State Festbier as well. Actually, the group itinerary--they don’t read this shit site, I figure I’m safe--reads as follows: “6:00 PM. Broken Clock & 56 | Laugh at [MNW’s] jokes, solemnly agree that Northwestern is in a rebuilding season.” So even my uninterested-in-college-football friends are taking the piss out of fucking Northwestern football. Whatever.
Fair State, Broken Clock, 56, Wicked Wort, Pig Ate My Pizza, Modist...gonna be a good night of drinking this shitshow game away. Congrats to Indiana on Receiving More Votes.
I shall be amid the broad green fields that nourish our land, within the Columns, as Memorial Stadium would probably be affectionately known if national sportswriters cared about Illini football. I’ll spend many hours before the game in Grange Grove, where no current student has ever experienced how an Illini home crowd responds to three straight wins. I will be drinking on many things, but chiefly a red ale with peanut that I’ve brewed for the occasion. That’s right. NUTGERS.
Candystripes For Breakfast
Since this game somehow became the clears throat FIRST EVER NOVEMBER NIGHT GAME IN MEMORIAL STADIUM HISTORY for some reason, I’ll catch most of the first half at work, then thanks to a rare evening of not closing, I’ll get to go home to watch the end. Coke products abound.
Not a great lineup for the bye week. Looks like Michigan-Maryland is one of the few AFN selections, so I’ll watch that and follow Husker-’due on my phone. I weighed in this week heavier than ever before, so it’s water for me.
White Speed Receiver
I will be spending my bye weekend south of the Mason-Dixon line playing some golf.
Bye week couldn’t come at a better time...for me. This is Florida Georgia weekend on my little island. The Cocktail Party is huge here, because this is where all the UGA fans stay. The game is held in Jacksonville. I once had to bribe a bartender for a tiny, bartop tv, to watch PSU. All the giant flat screens were on the SEC. I’ll be coaching softball, catching a few waves, and watching /checks schedule/...ugh. I’m sure I’ll watch something. I’ll definitely be drinking something.
I’ll be home in metro Detroit, continuing the eternal process of unpacking and fiddling with house stuff. Basketball starts next week, so we here at OTE have a lot to do to prepare for the beginning of sports season. Exciting!
Here’s the thing about your team being bad: football becomes much less of an event. I’m not sure if I’ll be home or if I’ll slip up to Lincoln, but I guess I’ll have the game on whatever I do. Probably? I don’t know. Kind of over this season.
I’ll be at home, shades drawn, writing dark poetry. I’ll be sipping on a Leinenkugel Fall Harvest Shandy because that is what I deserve. Oh, and I may watch the first 8 minutes of the Maryland football game, inspiration for the poetry and all that. Once Upon a Mid-Day Beery, I sat watching, bleak and dreary.
I’ll be in Los Angeles this weekend, enjoying not going near LAX for a change. Michigan/Maryland from the couch. After the game, Torrance has long been somewhat of a hot spot for microbreweries, neighboring Lomita is joining the fray, and Burning Daylight is one of the better options. I’ll find myself there at some point.
Wisconsin’s on a bye this week so you creeps and weirdos don’t get to know what I’ll be up to. But it’ll be a food truck rodeo and a dia de los muertos block party.
In Lincoln. Hoping the game will go well, yet expecting it won’t.
What about you, loyal reader? Head down to the comments and let us know how you’ll be spending this bye-week hell of a game day.