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Ohio State, Penn State ranked in Top 4 of first College Football Playoff rankings

Can we interest you in a pair of intra-conference semifinals? No? Well...uh...cheer for Minnesota, I guess?

NCAA Basketball: Rutgers at Penn State Rich Barnes-USA TODAY Sports

In the desire to capture even more of your attention, ESPN has released its first set of College Football Playoff rankings for the 2019 season. This after I did all that hard work on my bowl projections. (I stand by them.)

Thumpasaurus is here to run you through the shit that matters:

25. SMU Mustangs : I wonder what would have to happen for SMU to make the CFP at this point. How many losses would each P5 champ need? Are they even capable of racking up that number of losses?
24. Navy Midshipmen: The lone triple option team in the top 25 because the CFP committee does not appreciate football
23. Oklahoma State Cowboys: A three-loss team checks in at 23. Hey guess what, SMU beat TCU as well, it’s not that impressive.
22. Boise State Broncos [if you ever want to see what a really dumb boner looks like, ESPN had them in the AAC—I make my mistakes for free, you assholes]
21. Memphis Tigers: The victors of SMUMPHIS are the third of four teams from The American to be featured here. Maybe the Rutgers Scarlet Knights don’t belong there either?
20. Cincinnati Bearcats: Nearly pissed it away against the East Carolina Pirates, but they remain the top G5 team for now. The top 25 only has room for at most two of these American teams.
19. Wake Forest Demon Deacons: Just as Minnesota knows that even without Penn State, there would still be the omnicidal dragon that is Ohio State left, Wake Forest fans surely know this is ultimately futile with Clemson around. It sure is nice to dream, though.

18. Iowa Hawkeyes:

The decision to put Iowa at #18 on November 5th was probably made back in August.

17. Minnesota Golden Gophers:

This one, however, was not. The West frontrunner by two games nevertheless is sandwiched in between Iowa and Wisconsin.
16. Kansas State Wildcats: Chris Kliemann prefers a more open playoff system
15. Notre Dame Fighting Irish - Thanks a lot, Virginia Tech. You could have prevented this.

14. Michigan Wolverines -

31 points = one position in the playoff rankings

13. Wisconsin Badgers -

The highest-ranked team with a loss to the Illinois Fighting Illini
12. Baylor Bears - The highest-ranked undefeated team nobody believes in. Sorry, Minnesota.
11. Auburn Tigers - The first of the 2-loss SEC teams checks in ahead of two undefeated P5 teams.
10. Florida Gators - And here’s the second
9. Oklahoma Sooners - The punishment for losing to K State was severe, especially since Texas keeps aging poorly as a win
8. Utah Utes - What’s the PAC12 doing up here? I guess they have two teams that are going to have to play at the end.
7. Oregon Ducks - Already lost to Auburn to seemingly knock the PAC12 out of the playoffs, but checks in ahead of perennial favorite Oklahoma...for now
6. Georgia Bulldogs - The highest ranked team with a loss to Will Muschamp
5. Clemson Tigers - The defending national champs only beat North Carolina by one point, and nobody is going to let them forget it. Win by 222 or don’t bother winning.

4. Penn State Nittany Lions -

Their game against Ohio State is essentially a playoff semifinal at this point
3. Alabama Crimson Tide - Their game against LSU is essentially meaningless at this point
2. LSU Tigers - Ask Les Miles what it means to beat Alabama in pursuit of a national title

1. Ohio State Buckeyes -

The best team they beat lost to Illinois, but here they are!

Compiled by people whose teams have no relevance to this topic at all.

Discuss. Who’s overrated and why is it Michigan?