Peanut Butter on Burgers? A new OC bump? // B1G 2019, Indiana Potluck #2

Question #1: Peanut Butter on Burgers?

For whatever reason, the good people of Indiana appear to like to put peanut butter on their hamburgers. This confuses me greatly, but I’m not one to judge.

Instead I’ll simply ask: 1) Would you eat a burger with peanut butter on it? And 2) What’s the weirdest thing people in your state do to hamburgers?

BRT: I absolutely would! I’ve have it twice, and it was great in both incarnations.

My favorite is served at a place in Lincoln’s Haymarket District called Leadbelly’s. It’s a burger called the “Raspberry Beret” and contains: “Candied bacon, jerk-ginger peanut butter, raspberry-jalepeno jam, romaine, red onion, toasted brioche bun.” And it is incredible.

I don’t know why peanut butter on burgers works, but at least if it’s combined with other accompaniments, it can be transcendent. I don’t know if we do a lot of weird stuff to hamburgers as standard practice, but if you’re in Lincoln, check out Honest Abe’s: it’s an Abraham Lincoln-themed restaurant (yes), and they’ve got a revolving menu of unusual and delicious burgers. The 1809 is my jam: pickled apples / smoky sweet mayo / gouda cheese / chopped bacon. Mmmmmm. (Yes, I am chubby. Burgers are delicious.)

Dead Read: The late lamented P.O.Pears in Lincoln also had peanut butter burger. Word has it that Doug Gottleib recommended it to anyone who visited Lincoln.

Candystripes: I’m pretty sure the peanut butter-on-hamburgers thing is mostly the creation of Triple XXX Family Restaurant in West Lafayette (Boilerman31 Note: It is, and Triple XXX is a root beer brand that was established long before porn took the notation.), so I object to many things about this question. And yes, that is the actual name of the restaurant. I am laughing right along with you.

But to actually answer the thing you asked, no, I have no interest in peanut butter on a burger.

Townie: Peanut butter on burgers? Get right the hell out.

However, my home state of Pennsyltucky likes to go big. And the world’s largest burger, at 15 pounds, can be found at Denny’s Beer Barrel Pub in Clearfield P.A. Here’s what the review says:

... the idea of a restaurant whose everyday menu is designed to overwhelm you -- where a meal can be just TOO MUCH -- seems impossible in our double-stuffed land of casual fit superabundance. To operate continuously at a gastro-bypass level takes, for lack of a better word, guts.

Denny’s Beer Barrel Pub, “Home of the World’s Largest Burgers,” is that kind of place.

Yeah. Suddenly peanut butter doesn’t sound all that bad.

LPW: I’m allergic to peanut butter. I carry an Epi-pen with me everywhere. My father said I’d outgrow my peanut allergy by the time I turned 15 like he did. I’m 38, and I’m still allergic to peanuts. Thanks for getting my hopes up, Dad. That being said, what the flying fuck?!? Peanut butter does not belong on cheeseburgers! It does not belong in beer (no, I haven’t randomly sampled a beer that has peanuts in it, but I saw one on the menu tonight, which is disturbing), just leave peanuts on PB&J sandwiches. Anyone who puts peanuts in beer should be flogged. Peanut butter on burgers is like being forced to watch Rutgers football or Lil Red dancing against your will. It’s fucking poison to me. (Fwiw, if one of my esteemed “writers” were sitting near me at Ryan Field eating peanuts, I’d smell it right away, but it wouldn’t cause an allergic reaction. I’d just be mildly perturbed.) And I wish it weren’t. I know that people can be allergic to seafood and shellfish in particular, and I absolutely love seafood and shellfish.

Honestly, I can’t imagine anything weird people in Illinois, or the Chicago area specifically do weird to burgers. Due to my food allergy, I’m a bit conservative with what I choose to eat and tend to get a fairly basic cheeseburger.

Thumpasaurus: I have most definitely had peanut butter on a burger. I’m almost positive I had one at Lockdown Burger in Chicago’s Ukrainian Village (RIP Lockdown Burger). May have also involved an egg. Anyway, I’ll try anything not only once, but enough times to eliminate all doubts as to whether or not I like it.

I like food, you see.

WSR: First of all, I beg a thousand pardons for crossing my state of Indiana streams. I just looked up “weirdest food trends” for the state and...yeah. Close enough, but not really at all.

And I actually do like a burger with peanut butter on it. I’ve had a few at Blue Door, and maybe it’s just that they don’t make bad burgers. And as for the weirdest thing I’ve seen done to a burger, well I think the Blue Door does have that covered by stuffing everything inside. And the St. Patrick’s Day Blucy a few years ago stuffed with corned beef, cabbage, and potato definitely takes the cake of the weirdest of the weird. (For the record, it was still somehow delicious.)

MNW: I’m not a big PB-on-burgers guy; I’m really just popping in to concur that the St. Patrick’s Day Blucy was delicious.

And to mention that the Beer Cheese burger at The Tap in Bloomington was really good. But I’m open to learn where the best burger in Bloomington is.

Stew: Peanut butter burgers are A Thing in Decorah, IA, where I went to college. As for what’s a weird thing Iowans do to burgers? Not a goddamn thing. Change? No thank you, sir.

Question #2: DeBoer’d?

Once again, the Indiana offense was rather forgettable last year. They only scored above 28 points 4 times, including a pair of non-conf games, a win over Maryland, and a wild Friday night in Minnesota that had plenty of fireworks in a a bit of a downpour, and finished tied for 11th in conference PPG with Northwestern. On the plus side, the Hoosiers do return key pieces at WR, QB, and the rather fun and entertaining Stevie Scott at RB. That being said, they also lose a big chunk of their OL.

Is there hope for them to improve numbers to go along with the 3rd-ranked passing offense of 2018, or will the team be as exciting as Tom Allen’s name and appearance?

BRT: I always forget about Indiana when I’m doing Power Polls, and every time I look up Tom Allen to do something weird with photoshop, it’s like I’m seeing him for the first time because I never remember anything at all about him.

What was the question? Oh. I’ll probably only remember anything about Indiana’s offense if they outscore Nebraska’s, which they might, given our defense.

Candystripes: Two words, one name: Kalen DeBoer. The primary reason to believe he’ll engineer a turnaround on offense is that he’s done the same for both Fresno State (his prior job) and Eastern Michigan (the job before that). The secondary reason is that he’s not Mike Debord.

Townie: Football under this coach is utterly boring. I can’t name a single kid on Indiana’s team. I don’t know their identity or their scheme. They are the wonderbread of the B1G.

MNW: Insightful.

The more I read about Kalen DeBoer, the more I like. Now, granted, his offenses at Fresno State were bolstered by Marcus McMaryion at quarterback--and I don’t think Peyton Ramsey is McMaryion. But DeBoer does the things that could work at Indiana: In 2017 and 2018 the Bulldogs kept third down distances manageable, used short chunk passes to gain yards, and avoided sacks, something DeBoer also did with Eastern Michigan in 2016--and I’m pretty sure Brogan Roback is no Peyton Ramsey.

If DeBoer’s got something up his sleeve now that he’s got a helluva running back--all due respect to Ronnie Rivers--in Stevie Scott, and if he can rebuild a decidedly-mediocre line quickly, I’ll believe in the Indiana offense.

Thumpasaurus: How did I miss DeBord to DeBoer? That’s fantastic.

I don’t expect big things from the Hoosiers on offense. The QB position is up for grabs, with Peyton Ramsey an experienced starter with established limitations who nevertheless has to learn a new offense like everyone else. The RB corps is solid, but that will only matter if the offensive line can hold its own.

LPW: If Indiana has a substandard OL, then they’re screwed. I’m like Townie, in that I find the Hoosiers boring. I rather liked the days when they had monsters like Jason Spriggs blocking for Jordan Howard, or a complete rarity like Antwaan Randle-El going all Superman against Wisconsin back in 2000 or 2001.

I just don’t have any confidence in an Indiana squad coached by Tom Allen.

WSR: You’ll have to forgive me, but I’m not willing to put a ton of faith in a new OC in his first year on the job running the show for a team rebuilding its OL.

I think that Stevie Scott will be the most underappreciated player in the East, DeBoer will be quite good long-term (also: THANK YOU FOR TAKING HIM AWAY FROM FRESNO!), and the Hoosiers will be middling-to-meh.

They won’t be as prolific as tOSU or Penn State, and they won’t be as bad as Rutgers or Michigan (PROVE ME WRONG, GATTIS!) this fall. The crossovers aren’t great, but I think it’s possible for them to hover around the middle of the league in terms of scoring and yards.

Stew: I think they’ll be better, overall, than they were last year, but that’s a low hurdle. Their best case is probably to go towards an offense similar to mid-aughts jNW. Peyton Ramsey is pretty damn accurate, but prefers the check-down.

Might as well just make your offense out of those short slants, and passes to Scott in the flat. Just completely piss off your opponents.