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Slapdash Saturday Slackchat: What’s your most controversial beer take?

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Here’s what the OTE idiots have been wasting their time arguing about THIS week.

30th Annual Nightclub & Bar Convention And Trade Show - Day 2
no not the girl, the shandy, goddamnit
Photo by Gabe Ginsberg/Getty Images for Nightclub & Bar Media Group

We’ve passed the summer solstice, and college football is still so far away :(

But as our B1G 2019 previews roll on, we’ve realized that we miss you idiots. (No, really! OK, kind of. Fine, we’re filling a #content quota, shut up.) As, next week, we take a break from our previews to celebrate AMERICA WEEK—how is it almost July already?!—we thought we’d check in and see how things were.

So: As your reward for surviving Michigan State Week, here’s an idiotic discussion we were subjected to the other day after BrianB2 declared in the Michigan State offense preview that he thought Founders was overrated, then followed it up by calling Shiner Bock “one of the worst beers I’ve ever had”:

What’s your most controversial beer take?

BrianB2: I feel as I could be much more controversial than that.

MC ClapYoHandz: IPAs are garbage.

BrianB2: Bourbon Barrel Aged beers are overrated and overpriced.

Ray Ransom: Shandy is the final evolution of beer. All beer that has come before is merely a means to an end and all beer that shall come after is merely tribute.

BigRedTwice: IPAs are Pine Sol, but fans are too dumb to notice.

Boilerman31: Beer not fermented with yeast is not actual beer but an abomination in the eyes of the Lord.

Beezer07: I hit thumbs down any time a Springsteen song comes on a streaming playlist

Oh, beer tie in. Sometimes I drink beer while I’m doing the thumbs down thing

MNW: A couple of olives to spice (salt?) up a Coors Light or whatever light macro some shitty bar in middle-of-nowhere wisconsin serves alongside Spotted Cow is perfectly acceptable and should be tried more often. Long live the South Dakota martini!

WhiteSpeedReceiver: IPAs are crap, and the popularity of Budweiser is proof that people are stupid and have no taste.

Beez: Ok real beer take. “Peak beer” is ultimately bad. It’s made it possible for every crap ass brewer or brewery owner to be successful despite only selling middling at best beer. 90% of craft beer is complete garbage

WSR: But beer is good and people should drink what they like. [NO ROOM FOR THAT SHIT HERE, COMMIE]

Boilerman31: Maybe more controversial. Pumpkin Ales are fucking awful.

Beez: Most of them are bad, yes! Because just as Joe Schmo awful brewmaster thinks you can take garbage and add hops to it until it’s so bitter people pretend to like it to be cool, Bro thinks you can add clove and cinnamon to water and call it pumpkin ale (edited)

Bman31: Other than that, most beer is good. Some beer is better.

Ray: Stouts and Ales are trash. Just eat a loaf of bread instead.

(although really, all beer is sent from heaven)

(except red ales fuck that shit)

BrianB2: You don’t drink stouts or ales? What the hell does that even leave

You just drink Yuenglings all day?

MC ClapYoHandz: Lakefront has a pumpkin *lager* though, and it’s tremendous

Andrew Kraszewski: Whitsun is the best wheat on the planet, yes, better than Oberon, and if anyone is willing to assist with my asylum claim in another state that would be appreciated

Also BrianB2, Ray is a child who only likes beer-tinted soda aka Leiny.

stewmonkey13: 1. Stouts ARE ales. Ales are fermented around 70 degrees F, with the yeast sprinkled on top of the wort. Lagers are cold fermented (around 40 degrees F), with the wort poured on top of the yeast. Lagers aren’t nearly as flavorful. As you get a lot more yeast flavor, and the cold keeps the flavor down. Pretty much all lagers have a similar, crisp, flavor. [YAWN GET TO THE FUCKING HOT TAKES, YOU NERD]

BrianB2: tl;dr MC Clap is dumb and I hate him.

stewmonkey13: Belgian beers are bad. There are exceptions, but for the most part, they’re just absolutely terrible. Yeast should be used for fermentation, not for flavoring. Beer is not to taste like banana or cloves.

Poll

Who comes out of this looking the dumbest?

This poll is closed

  • 6%
    Brian
    (10 votes)
  • 4%
    BRT
    (6 votes)
  • 8%
    beez
    (12 votes)
  • 6%
    MC Clap
    (10 votes)
  • 6%
    WSR
    (9 votes)
  • 10%
    Stew
    (15 votes)
  • 2%
    Boilerman
    (4 votes)
  • 0%
    Andrew
    (1 vote)
  • 35%
    Ray
    (52 votes)
  • 17%
    MNW, somehow
    (26 votes)
145 votes total Vote Now