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Tonight is the college football national championship. Yes, that is correct, you are very excited.
It is played between two teams that are named “the Tigers”. Did you know two teams could be called the Tigers and could both play each other? I didn’t!
Anyways congratulations to North Central College (IL), the D-III national champions (def. Wisconsin-Whitewater, 41-14); the University of West Florida, the D-II national champions (def. Mankato State, 48-40); and North Dakota Junior College for Oil Drilling and Petrostate Management (def. one of our Founding Fathers thus letting the terrorists win). Nice to watch actual amateur football players do well.
The Details
CFP National Championship
[3] Clemson Tigers vs. [1] LSU Tigers
Mercedes-Benz Superdome, New Orleans, LA
7pm | ESPN | LSU -5.5 | O/U 68
The Picks
MNW: two excellent tiger-based fight songs: “Tiger Rag”
...vs. “Neck”:
anyways your thoughts on the national championship winner
WSR: Iowa wrestling, Mankato hockey, and cirrhosis for me because holy hell.
Candystripes: LSU to win outright, and also an encouragement to bet LSU on any spread under a touchdown. Also, a prediction that 31-21 will either be the final score, or the halftime score.
beezer07: Clemson outright because the world is a dark cold lonely place
BigRedTwice: LSU. 27 mentions of “Hey, Tigers vs. Tigers, you guys!”
WSR: Oh yeah. LSU by about 17. I’ll say 45-28.
ZuzuRU: LSU gon’ demolish Clemson
Boilerman31: The degenerate in me is leaning towards Clemson but in reality, only the house wins.
pkloa: LSU seems the better team, but Clemson has proven their ability to take advantage of idiotic mistakes. Give me the (LSU) Tigers for the win, 38-13.
Stewmonkey13: I think LSU is the slightly better team. I really want LSU to win. But I think this line is too high, and that LSU is a little overrated. So give me LSU in a tight game.
LPW: LSU
87townie: LSU [ed. note: thanks for that riveting insight, LPW and Townie]
Jesse Collins: Clemson... They keep winning weird games and they’re talented as hell. LSU is probably the better team this year, but that doesn’t always work out.
MNW: Corporate will yell at me if I don’t make this beautiful and SEO’d, and as I am a college football expert I have so many takes.
Joe Burrow, for example, won the Heisman. Not many people know that! Some people thought Trevor Lawrence would win it before the season started, but that’s a misplaced modifier and there’s really no point to winning a Heisman before the year starts. It also bothers me how Travis Etienne’s last name is pronounced, but that’s less important.
LSU has two guys who are really fast and catch lots of touchdowns. Their names are Ja’Marr Chase and Justin Jefferson, and I’m pretty sure each one scored seven touchdowns against Oklahoma. But I’m not going to fact-check that.
If you care about the defensive players’ names you’re an idiot, because hopefully this game will end 54-47, LSU.
Poll
Who wins?
This poll is closed
-
53%
LSU
-
14%
Clemson
-
32%
the tigers hahahahahaha wow i should be on ryan and kelly live with material like this
Is Anything Else On?
What a good-looking question! It looks like there’s a good amount of NBA and NHL on tonight, so maybe you can watch that. Otherwise I think we’ve got a bangin’ slate of college basketball, dead ahead!
Jackson State Tigers at Southern Jaguars
3pm | no TV | JSU -1 | O/U 133.5
It super bums me out that there’s no streaming service for SWAC basketball. Lots of other SWACtion on tonight, but you’re gonna have to wait for the five SWAC games a year ESPNU shows before the conference tournament.
Cornell Big Red vs. Elmira Looks-Like-An-Eagle
5pm | ESPN+
Why? Because it’s on.
Edit: Google informs me that Elmira is actually called the “Soaring Eagles”, which is an awesome nickname. Go Soaring Eagles!
Boston University Terriers at Loyola-MD Greyhounds
6pm | CBSSN | Boston -4 | O/U 144
This is what I’m talking about! Dumb, bad basketball on a silly channel. Former Northwestern assistant and player Tavaras Hardy runs for show for the ‘Hounds, though, and he’s cool.
South Carolina State Bulldogs at Howard Bison
6:30pm | HowardTV | SCSt -5 | O/U 146
NC Central Eagles at MD-Eastern Shore Fighting Hawks
6:30pm | Facebook | MCC -7 | O/U 126
Coppin State Eagles at Florida A&M Rattlers
7pm | FAMUtv | FAMU -3 | O/U 145.5
Thankfully there’s the MEAC, which still cares about consumers’ God-given right to watch bad basketball on as many channels as they want! Let’s see how good this conference is...
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Ohhhhh yeah. So, to review, you can watch LSU-Clemson, or you can watch the following matchups of Kenpom teams...
- SCSt (334) vs. Howard (349)
- NCC (311) vs. UMES (352)
- Coppin (322) vs. FAMU (302)
College basketball is such a wonderful place.
Grambling State Tigers at Alcorn State Braves
7:30pm | AlcornTV | Grambling -3.5 | O/U 141
Portland State Vikings at Montana Grizzlies
8pm | PlutoTV | Montana -7 | O/U 144.5
PlutoTV is always there for you. Still waiting on that sponsorship.
Maybe none of that moves the needle for you. Uh...you streaming anything good on Netflix right now? My wife and I plowed through the new season of The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, and now we’re just waiting on Schitt’s Creek to be released, too. Taking suggestions in the comments.
Here’s your open thread for tonight’s basketball games! And football, whatever. Usual rules apply: No illegal streams, don’t be a dick, and there’s probably a third one too but I rarely pay attention. Don’t piss Dead Read off.