The OTE Weekly Mailbag isn’t sure where we are.

So...Minnesota, Penn State, and Iowa are 0-2. Northwestern and Purdue are 2-0. Rutgers beat Michigan State who beat Michigan, while Indiana beat Rutgers and Penn State.

If it wasn’t for the calming normality of Ohio State salting the earth, I would be terrified right now. But even they appear to have some semblance of mortality but only if they have to rely on kicking FGs, and good luck trying to make that a thing for an entire game.

The most satisfying result of the weekend? Obviously the wisconsin-Nebraska game. But we can’t bask in the glow of the thermonuclear rage of Nebraska fans on the internet forever, so we’re going to need your help more now than ever. Please ask us stuff. That’ll make us consider watching football, and goodness knows that most of us could use that distraction right now. So please ask us things about football, or seasonal traditions gone wildly awry, or my plans to steal MNWildcat’s cat (Steven Soderbergh may or may not be directing the heist) and we’ll do our best to answer them. Hopefully it’ll even be on Friday when I want to post the responses, but real life probably won’t allow that to happen yet again.

Thank you, have a wonderful week, and please be wary of Spencer Petras passes if you’re walking outside. I would have added the word “errant,” but we have no proof that it’d be accurate to include it. And much like the Gopher defense, there will be no stopping.