Ten B1G Things

1. Prior to this victory, Indiana has lost 10 straight to Wisconsin by an average score of 51-15
2. Tom Allen had the best postgame interview ever, because every time he tried to talk he was interrupted by another Indiana player shouting into the camera that Tom Allen is the best coach in America
3. I—like much of America—hate the state of Indiana...but you just have to love this Hoosier team
4. Graham Mertz is an object lesson in the dangers of setting expectations high
5. Michigan looked better than they have in weeks
6. Ohio State had two 100+ yd rushers behind 80% replacement line
7. The variance on Michigan State’s performances this season is so staggering it looks to be one of my many wrong answers in Prob & Stat class
8. The variance on the snaps from OSU’s backup center was somehow even greater
9. East Lansing is about to put a bounty on OSU punters
10. Purdue Defense: The Rehabilitation of Adrian Martinez
11. If both Brohm and Frost are employed after this season it will truly be a Christmas miracle
12. Isaiah Williams...the name still gives me chills
13. Not to be confused with Isiah Williams
14. OSU is absolutely going to be sent to the B1G CCG regardless of the “rule”

The Rundown

Indiana at Wisconsin | Tom Allen is for real 14-6

It took a late defensive stand and a few bad Wisconsin drops to seal it, but the Hoosiers have shaken another monkey off their backs. You could be forgiven for assuming the season was over when Penix was lost to injury, but as octogenarian head-donner Lee Corso would say, “not so fast my friend.” Backup Jack Tuttle pitched 2 TDs in a performance that showcased the depth of Tom Allen’s program.

Beez: Shit’s lame.

C4B: Ten years ago, in Madison, a funny thing happened to Indiana football: they just couldn’t possibly stop Wisconsin. You probably don’t remember that game, unless you happen to be a fan of either IU or Wisconsin, but you may have heard the score: 83-20. 10 years later, the two teams barely combined to hit Indiana’s total from that game. This time, though, Indiana stopped Wisconsin. Like, a lot. And Jack Tuttle did pretty decently after settling in. You’ll never confuse him for the injured Mike Penix, but the Hoosiers didn’t need major heroics on offense today, just a nice Milton Berle game: just enough to win.Also, has anyone else noticed that this year has basically been the “Indiana takes revenge” season? It’s nice to be on this side for once

Ohio State at Michigan State | No line, no cry 52-12

Justin Fields is every bit the athlete he was purported to be. 104 yards rushing, 199 passing, 4 TDs. Even 4 of 5 starters out on the line, OSU dominated on sheer talent. More of the same, really.

Absentee Kommentatorski: Didn’t see it, looks like it was pretty bad, consistent with expectations.

Iowa at Illinois | The I’s have it, 35-21

It looked good for awhile, but Illinois’ 1-pt lead at intermission was not to last. Spencer Petras’ 3-TD showing looked almost quarterback-like. Well done on a gritty win against a tough B1G West foe, Hawkeyes.

Thump: The only thing that made this an atypical Illinois performance was a neat little dream sequence at the start of the game where we looked like a football team. Then we just were Illinois. We are always going to suck. We’re not due for a fun season until at least 2024.

You know, last year was the most fun illini season since 2007. 80% of college football fans have that much fun every single year.

Stew: That was such a shitty start to the game for Iowa. It would be hard for Spencer Petras to have played much worse. Meanwhile the Iowa defense just didn’t show up at the start, allowing Illinois to march to opening touchdowns. But then the 2nd quarter started and the defense started to clamp down. Iowa’s running game started going. And then in the 2nd half it was all Iowa and Petras looked downright competent, while Illinois couldn’t do a damn thing against Iowa’s defense until the backups were in.

Iowa’s offense is still not good, Petras is still most awful. But it was good to see him not completely implode. And Iowa still managed to score 35 points. But the defense, once it’s settled in is still great. Daviyon Nixon is a beast.

Creighton: Same analysis I’ve had every week for at least ten years.The offense: It’s bad!The defense: Good as hell!I’ll focus on the positives since the negatives with this team never change. Sure it was Illinois, but for the first time in his career Spencer Petras got better as the game went on. After Iowa went down by 14 I was sure Petras was toast. Instead he settled in and finished the day with 3 touchdowns, 0 interceptions, and an acceptable 64% completion percentage. His third touchdown in particular was easily the best pass I’ve seen him throw this year. I don’t think he’s going to pull a rabbit out of his hat and suddenly turn into Chuck Long next week, but the fact that he is, in theory, capable of serviceable quarterback play when he needs to be? Well buddy, worse things than that have happened in 2020.Anyway, my only other note to Brian Ferentz is “moar wildcat read options”

Nebraska at Purdue | Frost bests Brohm in battle of overhyped coaches, 37-27

Purdue briefly made it a game, battling back from a 34-13 deficit to make it a one-score affair in the fourth. But Martinez did what he had done all afternoon—gashed the Purdue defense with his arm and legs to move the Huskers 79 yards for a field goal. Is the shine off Brohm yet? The shine should be off Brohm. We know it’s off Frost.

BoilerBettor: Once this game was over, I went outside to restake Christmas decorations. As I pounded the stakes back into the ground, I accidentally hit my thumb. It stung a little bit but I carried on. By the second and third time it happened, my thumb really started to hurt. But you know what, I did it a couple more times. What better metaphor for Purdue Football this year? Anyhow, here’s Wonderwall.

BRT: Nebraska won! I find that exciting, while realizing that’s a minority view. The defense, on the whole, had a really nice day, and after so much ineptitude on that side of the ball (some of which is currently coaching for Purdue...) it was nice to see a fairly solid performance there, especially rushing (Purdue finished with -2 rushing yards.) Purdue has some real offensive weapons, so that’s not nothing. I also enjoyed Adrian Martinez having a solid day after a rollercoaster of a season.If you tuned into this game, you likely noticed the many penalties committed by both teams each minute. It made this game what I described as “a Carnival of Dumb.” Nevertheless, Carnivals of Dumb have to be won by someone, and I’m glad that for once, it was Nebraska. (edited)

Dead_Read: This was an ugly game. Three people were carted off the field (the first during warmups), and each team had over a century of penalty yards. Each team had a punt blocked, and there was a lot of chirping between plays. It was an experience. Oddly, there were no turnovers.

Even with a blocked punt, Nebraska won the special teams phase, and that made all the difference. That is a marked improvement! If we can continue to improve and build on this, the Huskers will have a chance in the next contest - whenever that might occur.

Penn State at Rutgers | Penn State win the Golden Jug of Cheesesteak, 23-7

This was a game. That’s about all you can say for it. Nobody looked good here. I honestly don’t have the energy to write about Sean Clifford looking pedestrian AF again. So, just read whatever Yorke wrote below.

Whatever Yorke Wrote: James Franklin better be scouring the graduate transfer market for a 2021 quarterback, because I don’t think I can take another year of the Sean Clifford and Will Levis show. James Franklin and Kirk Ciarrocca don’t trust those guys to throw beyond the depth of a bubble screen, so it’s a good thing that the run game continues to be excellent. Also, the Penn State defense showed up for an entire game and was one Noah Vedral prayer away from shutting out Rutgers.