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Semifinal #1: Peay vs. Colletto

I really thought this sounded like fun at one time.

Footage from the 3rd quarter

Here we are.

Only three matchups left before you are rid of this drawn-out focus on bad football. We’ve made it this far. We just need to push through a bit more, and then we can agree never to speak of this again.

Anyway, semifinal #1 features ‘03 Indiana vs. ‘13 Purdue. Now, it may not be a surprise that a hoops-mad state gave us two of the worst football teams of the last twenty years. However, can we reflect for a minute on the difference between “hoops-mad” and “actually having a lot to celebrate, hoops-wise”?


  • Purdue made the Rose Bowl 20 years ago. They last made the Final Four 40 years ago.
  • Purdue’s last Final Four appearance is nearer in time to their 1966 Rose Bowl team* than to their 2000 Rose Bowl team.
[*Which is so long ago that the Big Ten had a no repeat rule, the only reason Purdue made the Rose Bowl that year.]
  • The last time Purdue made the Final Four, Michael Jordan was in high school.
  • Here is a list of Big Ten schools that were in the Big Ten in 1980 and whose most recent Final Four appearance took place longer ago than Purdue’s:**

[**Yes it’s pseudo-cleverly worded to within an inch of its life. Still it’s true, so stick it.]


Do you know who Joe Barry Carroll is?

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  • 50%
    (85 votes)
  • 49%
    (82 votes)
167 votes total Vote Now


Do you care?

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  • 100%
    (130 votes)
130 votes total Vote Now

So, moving on, let’s talk about Indiana. Five national titles! And so long ago that you make Husker football fans seem like they’re living in the present.

  • Notre Dame has won a national title in football more recently than Indiana has in hoops.
  • Isaiah Thomas played at Indiana. A whole generation has recently learned about the Pistons, the Bulls, and Isaiah being left off the Dream Team. Indiana’s last national title is older than this picked-over beef.
  • The last time Indiana made the Elite Eight, Antonio Gates was on the opposing team.
  • The last time Indiana won a national title, the title game was the same night as the Academy Awards...and Paul Hogan was a co-host.
  • Indiana’s MOST RECENT national title is closer in time to Bill Russell’s college career than it is to today.


Not really a poll

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  • 100%
    Paul Hogan?
    (92 votes)
92 votes total Vote Now


Why am I being so mean-spirited?

This poll is closed

  • 40%
    I lack a soul
    (47 votes)
  • 59%
    I lost a wager with Satan, and only get to keep my soul because I created this damn tournament
    (70 votes)
117 votes total Vote Now

Look, I’ll paste the game-by-game again, but it’s pretty simple:

‘13 Purdue is probably the favorite to make the title game since they struggled with Indiana State more than ‘03 Indiana did, and because ‘03 Indiana actually won their close game against a shitty Illinois team. That’s what we’re looking at here: a combined 1-21 against FBS opponents and the win coming against a 1-seed in this tournament who themselves went 0-11 against FBS competition.

If he hadn’t died recently, it would have been appropriate to have Dieter Laser serve as honorary captain. As it is, let’s just have the managers brawl again.

(3) 2003 Indiana Hoosiers 2-10/1-7 (1-10 vs. FBS)

SRS -9.87: #97 of 117 (B1G ranked #3 conference)

14.8 PPG: #115 of 117 (13.9 vs. FBS)

32.3 Opp. PPG: #94 of 117 (35 vs FBS)

(1) 2013 Purdue Boilermakers 1-11/0-8 (0-11 vs. FBS)

-12.43 SRS: #110 of 125 (B1G #4 ranked conference)

14.9 PPG: #121 of 125 (14.6 vs. FBS)

38.0 Opp. PPG: #114 of 125 (40.2 vs. FBS)

  • L 7-42 @ Cincinnati Bearcats (finished 9-4, made bowl; 14-7 at half)
  • W 20-14 vs. Indiana State Sycamores (FCS opponent…went 1-11)
  • L 24-31 vs. #21 Notre Dame Fighting Irish (9-4, #20; Purdue led 17-10 after 3rd)
  • L 10-41 @ #24 Wisconsin Badgers (9-4, #22; no scoring last 14:56)
  • L 24-55 vs. Northern Illinois Huskies (12-2, made bowl; 27-10 at half, 48-17 after 3rd)
  • L 7-44 vs. Nebraska Cornhuskers (9-4, made bowl; 37-0 until last minute)
  • L 0-14 @ Michigan State Spartans (13-1, #3; 7-0 after 3rd)
  • L 0-56 vs. #4 Ohio State Buckeyes (12-2, #12; 42-0 at half)
  • L 14-38 vs. Iowa Hawkeyes (8-5, made bowl; 14-7 at half, 38-7 until last minute)
  • L 21-45 @ Penn State Nittany Lions (7-5, no bowl (probation); 28-21 in 3rd)
  • L 16-20 vs. Illinois Fighting Illini (4-8; 7-seed in field, Purdue led 14-7 after 1st, tied at 14 after 3rd)
  • L 36-56 @ Indiana Hoosiers (5-7; 49-9 in 3rd)


Who was worse?

This poll is closed

  • 24%
    2003 Indiana
    (54 votes)
  • 75%
    2013 Purdue
    (165 votes)
219 votes total Vote Now