Hi! Remember me? Enjoying Minnesota Week?

Me neither. To either.

So what’s going on, guys and gals?

Heard football’s canceled. That sucks, man.

But WSR had a great reflection on Minnesota football history and travel—it’s not, like, uplifting or anything, but it’s one of the more poignant reflections I’ve read in the decade or so I’ve wasted on this here blog.

Short answer: This is depressing as hell. So we all sat around and wallowed, right?

NEBRASKA!

Oh, you sweet summer child.

You know the story—you don’t need to click the links or anything else. In fact, having shown its whoooooooole ass in the last couple days, I’d recommend not clicking the Omaha World-Herald again. We like CornNation, go click them (though you’re forewarned about the comments):

So which South Carolina is Nebraska being—1833 South Carolina, or 1860 South Carolina?

“Consider them rolled” it’s not, but Kevin Warren with some shades of Delany in chiding the rebellious child actor that is 2020 Nebraska.

Of course, as Jesse has pointed out, Nebraska has right to be aggrieved, and the Big Ten (and its constituent fans) have every right to shout “SCOREBOARD” or “4-8!” or whatever else it is that scores a point in this day and age. Round and round we go.

A Reminder:

If someone loses by 39 to Northwestern, do the opposite of the things they do.

Oh yeah, Jeff Brohm’s got ideas.

And, I mean...

...not the dumbest thing I’ve ever seen? Way to skirt around that amateurism issue, guys. As long as we come out of this having maintained the status quo.

MAILBAG!

Got questions about 2021 football TIMES TWO?! Want to know how we’ll be getting through the offseason? Have completely random questions? Our writing staff sits poised and mostly ready to disregard your questions and rant about their personal bailiwicks.

Leave those comments below (while you can!) or tweet ‘em @offtackleempire.

Miss you guys.