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Sunday Morning Coming Down // Week 9

There’ a new JTT to put on a poster in your locker

Ohio State v Penn State Photo by Scott Taetsch/Getty Images

Ten B1G Things

  1. James Franklin improves to 1-7 against OSU
  2. Ohio State has scored 44 points in 7 straight games, tying the longest streak of 44+ point games (Michigan, 1901-1902)
  3. CJ Stroud did a wonderful job of looking absolutely befuddled for 3 quarters before torching the Penn State defense
  4. J.T. Tuimoloau has taken his place in the long and growing pantheon of OSU defensive ends who haunt PSU fans’ dreams
  5. Penn State falls to 0-11 in their last 11 matchups against top-10 teams...give that man a contract extension!
  6. Illinois—yes, THAT Illinois—currently has the longest streak for games with an interception at 11
  7. They also have the top scoring defense in the country
  8. Minnesota looks a lot like the guy who gets pushed around at work and goes home to kick his dog
  9. Rutgers, thou art the aforementioned dog
  10. If Michigan State had won, Donovan Edwards might’ve blamed members of a certain Abrahamic religion
  11. Awfully nice of Sparty to have trouble with the snaps for a change
  12. Harbaugh throwing deep balls with 1:30 on the clock up by 3 TDs tells you all you need to know about the man
  13. Halfway through the 4th, Michigan St had amassed -1 yards of 2nd half offense
  14. Them Ferentz boys are at it again, quieting critics with a double-digit offensive performance
  15. Bonus Non-B1G thing you should care about: The #9 and #10 teams lost by a combined score of 96-21 yesterday (Wake scored all 21) I’m sure an 8-team playoff will definitely be better and not at all just a way to extract more money from the system and deplete teams with less depth.

The Rundown

Ohio State at Penn State | Buckeyes dick around, 44-31

misdreavus79: Another year, another great opportunity wasted. Yes, I should take solace in the fact that it was 16-21 in the 4th quarter with 9 minutes left, when everyone and their mother expected them to be down 30 by then, but at the same time, maybe if they don’t turn the ball over four times, leading to 21 of those 44 Ohio State points, we have a different conversation. Shit, Penn State survived the two first half turnovers to be in the aforementioned position in the first place! If you want to beat a team like Ohio State, you have to play a near perfect game. Penn State played an atrocious game, and still had a chance to win. Sucks that they lost, but when death star marches down, not going down without a fight is something to be proud of. That and the fact that Allar will be the QB next season has me sleeping well.

87Townie: Well, this was the end of my week in State College. I’ll head home 1-1, after two great games. Today, I thought (for a while there) that we had a shot. But you can’t turn the ball over that many times and beat a team like Ohio State. Hat tip to that kid Tuimoloau. He had a huge game for OSU. The truth is, I’m coming out of this loss fired up for the rest of the season. OSU fans should be shaking in their boots. They are not the juggernaut the press makes them out to be. Eminently beatable.

GF3: As predicted by 87Townie weeks ago, PSU played just well enough to terrify OSU fans for awhile...until reality came calling. Though, sometimes I think the OSU coaches spend the first few quarters just trying new stuff in case they need it before deciding to go back to scoring at will. You can call a team “eminently beatable” to feel better about the loss all you want. When they can lose their best rusher and still put up 21 points in 11 plays...on top of absolutely mauling PSU’s record-setting QB to the point of grabbing his passes right out of the air at the point of departure...well, it’s hard to see it that way. It was nice of Day to put the scrubs in on defense to help PSU ruin some betting lines.

Moral victories will keep PSU fans warm for the next....*checks notes*...10 years of James Franklin. I’m no sports expert, but if a team is “eminently beatable” I’d think a man who is paid $75 million should try beating them for a change.

The early part of this performance would’ve been more concerning for the rest of the season had Michigan not settled for 5 FGs against Michigan State.

MaximumSam: Sometimes, having the best players makes the difference. OSU looked lost on defense all game, and the offense once again looked pretty rough running the ball. But Penn State couldn’t cover Marvin Harrison, Jr., and they couldn’t block JT Tuimoloau. That might have been the most impactful defensive performance I’ve seen from a player...ever? One for the history books.

Rutgers at Minnesota | Minnesota trounces the Least from the East, 31-0

WSR: Minnesota treated Rutgers like it was a non-conference cupcake. In fact, this was the first B1G shutout for the Gophers since we beat Illinois 45-0 in 2004. The first quarter flew by in 24 minutes behind Rutgers taking the opening kickoff and screwing around for 9 plays before Adam Korsak pinned us on our 1. We then proceeded to go on a 19 play 99 yard drive that consumed the entire rest of the first quarter and 2 plays into the second. It was the most B1G thing I have ever seen and I feel more alive having survived it. The game was over at that point other than the Gopher defense smothering a rather hapless Rutgers offense, Adam Korsak putting on a clinic (he followed up pinning us at the 1 with 77 and 63 yard mortars), the Gopher offense throwing rock (“good old rock, nothing beats rock”) to the tune of 253 yards on the ground on 53 attempts, and my kids making fun of the Scarlet Knights. The only group showing urgency and tempo today was the Minnesota Marching Band, who played the fastest set of Rousers I can remember. Quick, efficient performances that neither team wanted to duplicate on the field.

GF3: Since we have no Rutgers commentary (because LOL), allow me to use this space to congratulate OSU hockey from downing #1-ranked Minnesota on Friday night, splitting the two-game series.

Illinois at Nebraska | The Bertfect Storm gains strength, 26-9

Thumpasaurus: The unbelievable thing about this road win over a flawed but talented big ten team is how routine it seemed. After the first couple drives, things went against the illini and the huskers were stuffing virtually every offensive play. A turnover and some good old fashioned pull-the-guard-and-the-tackle shit put the illini ahead at the half and that was all she wrote. Adjustments were made. Some very stupid things happened. Cooler heads prevailed. It’s just unreal. I genuinely thought the uniform and the school simply made our football teams constitutionally incapable of this kind of conduct.

Two wins from clinching the big ten west. I am starting to worry that I actually screamed myself to death in Bloomington after Indiana scored the go ahead touchdown. And that it’s ten minutes after that and my mind is showing me the football season I always wanted to see to comfort me on my way towards oblivion.

He was a high school QB: Illinois gave up 9 points and it raised their average points allowed for the season. They’ve given up one second half score in the last six games and three for the year. I’m having some trouble wrapping my head around this, but it appears that we have an actual competent coaching staff, talented players, and are good for real. I don’t know what to do with my hands.gif.

Seriously though, I forgot what it was like to have expectations. When we were down 9-6, I had this feeling in the pit of my stomach that it took me a while to recognize, but I truly cared about the outcome of this game AND I didn’t expect to lose. I think 2009 was the last time I felt that and that team sure knocked that idea out of me.

deadread: If Casey Thompson were not injured, this could have been a competitive game. He did get injured, so it was not. Deep thought — Trey Palmer cannot help the Huskers if they cannot get him the ball. The upcoming matchup against the Gophers will not be easy on the eyes. GBR, I guess. (edited)

BRT: I’m not that mad about how the Huskers played in the first half. As DeadRead pointed out, with Casey Thompson, the Huskers were moving reasonably well on Illinois. But, shit happens, especially to Nebraska, and Chubba Purdy is... well, not good enough to beat Illinois, anyway. It’s also worth noting that as per usual, the Huskers made some dumb mistakes and squandered some opportunities— and these are the kinds of things that make a team 3-5.

Northwestern at Iowa | Kirk is still a whiny bitch, 33-13

stewmonkey13: Iowa had a veritable offensive explosion. The passing game worked, the running game worked. This all because jNW is just so very, VERY, bad. They made this Iowa offense look not horrid. The mind truly reels. Iowa’s defense seems to not have any lingering effects from the OSU game and just dominated jNW. They had 7 sacks by 7 different people, and just generally lived in jNW’s backfield. For a very LARGE chunk of the game jNW had negative rushing yards. They’re just all the way bad.

MNW: That game was the kind of third-term abortion that, if the political ads I just watched were to be believed, every single person in Iowa is guilty of supporting if they’ve ever even looked at a Democrat. Jim O’Neil ought to resign, and he would have already if he had a single shred of dignity or pride as a human being. Or, rather, I saw that Twitter said “quiet quitting” is already done. Are we sure about that? Has O’Neil just given up and not told anyone yet? Thirty-three points to the worst offense in America, and tomorrow Pat Fitzgerald will blame execution.

Lincolnparkwildcat: We made Brian Ferentz look like an offensive genius. That’s a crime against humanity. At least the Sickos Committee had their Super Bowl. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD FITZ WILL YOU FIRE YOUR FUCKING COORDINATORS?!?? You’re going to get a new stadium in a few years and you want us to schlep to Soldier Field to watch this shit? My father, who went to NU in the late sixties and early 70s, said that the dark ages are back.

Michigan St at Michigan | Michigan FGs Sparty into submission, 29-7

Brian: Michigan’s difficulties in the red zone kept the game closer than it could have been, but there was little doubt who the better team was Saturday night, as the Wolverines ultimately pulled away from an overmatched Spartan team. Leading just 13-7, at the half, Michigan dominated the final 30 minutes, outsourcing Michigan State 16-0 while holding the Spartans to just 63 second half yards. Next up … Rutgers.

RMB: Well it certainly didn’t start very well. At one point in the first quarter, Michigan was trailing 7-3 and getting outgained 117-79. From that point on, though, Blue outgained Sparty 364-136, got 23 first downs to MSU’s 13, and most importantly, outscored the evil green men 26-0. It wasn’t the 70-0 murdering I would have liked but it’ll do. Michigan only punted once, but kicked FIVE field goals. From this game I suspect the Illinois game will be pretty even. The OSU game won’t be even in the least. (Editor’s Note: Preserving this early reverse jinx effort for posterity.)

Arborvitae Krummytreeski: Eh, better team won. Kinda takes the wind out of a rivalry when one team fields a bottom-5 defense for an entire month. So, does this MSU team have a non-hatred inspired ceiling that involves winning 3 of 4 to crawl into a bowl? Honestly, who cares? They’re a really hard team to get excited about this year.