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The Who What When Where Why of the 2022 Bad Boy Mowers Pinstripe Bowl

Let’s take a look at this glorious pile of steaming horseshit.

Did you know this is the only bowl that doesn’t allow facial hair?
Photo by Rich Graessle/Icon Sportswire via Getty Images

Yay football! Who’s excited for a bowl game in a baseball stadium in New York in December?

Nobody. But fuck it. My team is here, so let’s do a preview.

Who: YOUR Minnesota Golden Gophers (8-4, t-2nd B1G West) vs. the Syracuse Orange (7-5, t-3 ACC Atlantic I guess)

What: 2022 Bad Boy Mowers Pinstripe Bowl, the 12 edition of this venerable classic

When: 1 PM God’s Time Zone, Thursday December 29th.

Where: Yankee Stadium, the pathetic shithole that’s home to the most pathetic baseball team in existence this side of the St. Louis Cardinals. I’m guessing part of the reason this game exists is because they need more than just a bunch of baseball games to justify the $1.2 billion in public subsidies to build this monument to trying to suck one’s own cock. Also, ESPN.

Why: Syracuse is here because they had a rather surprising season in which they unexpectedly beat NC State and Louisville, nearly upset Clemson, and won games they should have against UConn, Purdue, Wagner, Boston College, and Virginia. Minnesota is here because PJ Fleck pissed himself against Purdue and Iowa (who should be in this game to avoid a bowl game rematch and because they score as many points as a baseball team) and deserve to be shamed. It’s abhorrent and disappointing that Mo Ibrahim’s last college game is being played here.

Minnesota should win. Nobody’s opted out, and nobody of consequence is in the transfer portal. Which means we’ll probably lose and I’ll spend the offseason being salty as hell. Yay sports!