The NFL Draft happens tonight. And tomorrow. And the day after that. For now, though, I am telling you this for SEO purposes.
See? SBNation loves that stuff.
Where was I?
Ah, yes, the NFL Draft. (Damn, can’t get all those clicks a second time. But you have a GIF library now, so you’re set!)
What: A draft in which NFL teams like the perpetually disappointing Minnesota Vikings (SEO!) choose players in reverse order of finish from the previous season. How do you not know that?
When: Already told you.
Where: I dunno. On your couch? If you’re asking me where the draft people are picking and shouting and Jets fans are booing or shooting up or whatever they do, I don’t know. Let’s say Las Vegas, but I don’t think that’s right.
Time: 7pm Central
TV: ABC | ESPN | NFL Network
That seems excessive: And it is!
So what’s the difference? Listen, guy, I don’t know and I don’t care.
So why are you telling me about it on a Big Ten football blog? Contractual obligation.
Any other reasons? Some Big Ten players might get drafted.
Like who? WELL I’M GLAD YOU ASKED.
Names I Have Seen in Mock Drafts That I Looked Up 15 Minutes Ago
Aidan Hutchison (Edge, Michigan Wolverines)
Say, didn’t an Ohio State Man used to be their coach?
Garrett Wilson (WR, Ohio State Buckeyes)
Thankfully this means Ohio State has no more good wide receivers and will be bad in 2022.
Chris Olave (WR, Ohio State)
I’m sorry but they get TWO wide receivers drafted in the first round? In one year? Must’ve blown up the rest of the Big Ten and won the championship easily with that roster.
Jahan Dotson (WR, Penn State Nittany Lions)
Oh this one’s fun! Dotson is fast and has good hands and would be enjoyable if, as McShay thinks, he’s snapped up by the Arizona Cardinals at #23. Others at CBS Sports think Dotson goes #30 to Kansas City Chiefs, still others #22 to the Green Bay Packers. He seems fine, though, and I’d really hate to have to wish death on him.
George Karlaftis (Edge, Purdue Boilermakers)
Large man. Popular. #23 to the Cardinals in one, not in McShay’s first round, #14 to the Baltimore Ravens in some other CBS mock draft, #18 to the Eagles in yet another, #24 to the Dallas Cowboys in still one more.
I’m trying to write this before I get on a plane and suddenly regret biting off more than I can chew.
Daxton Hill (S/CB, Michigan)
This idea hasn’t gripped me. (Hill at #29 to Kansas City for McShay, #31 in another to the Cincinnati Bengals who must’ve traded back because they can’t possibly be good, #28 at Green Bay for another, totally off some lists.)
Boye Mafe (DL, Minnesota Gophers)
#29 to Kansas City is the pick of three draft-chewers.
Tyler Linderbaum (OL, Iowa Hawkeyes)
McShay says no, another has him #15 to the Iggles, something called Chris Trapasso who I’m sure never got bullied in school says #31 to the Bengals, who again must have traded back for this pick.
Bernhard Raimann (C, Michigan)
A+ name, I’m sorry this is the first I’m learning of him. #28 to the Packers in one projection.
David Ojabo (Edge, Michigan)
I hate how many Michigan Men are on this list.
Here’s your open thread for the night’s football shouting and trading and tape-chewing and draft-experting. Remember that Mel Kiper is staying at home because he’s likely an anti-vax asshole, and never forget that “draft experts” are not real people, just things you should look upon with nothing but scorn.