I. Case History and Opening Statement

A. Case History

• The Nebraska Cornhuskers were the best 3-9 team in 2022, with many analytics and media types fawning over the absurdity that was a roughly even point differential, insane losses grasped from the clutches of victory, and baffling special team gaffes
• Scott Frost is still - somehow - the coach of this team
• There is hope that a fairly decent defense improves on its successes from last year, and the transfer of one Ochaun Mathis - formerly of TCU - can be a missing ingredient along the defensive line
• Scott Frost took a decreased salary, decreased overall buyout amount, and undisclosed performance goals to still remain - in an incredible and mind-blowing move - the coach of this team
• Nebraska welcomes new coaches everywhere, including new Offensive Coordinator Mark Whipple, who very much got the job on the back of a great year at Pitt. Having a 1st round QB can make anyone look good, but hey, he cannot possibly be worst than what Nebraska had in 2021. Also, there is a ST coordinator finally, so that’s fun.
• Scott Frost - remarkably and arguably beyond understanding - is still the coach of the Nebraska Cornhuskers
• Casey Thompson transferred from Texas and will be starting at QB
• Scott Frost has a 15-29 record at Nebraska and is likely on his way to getting fired unless he miraculously can turn it around

B. Opening Statement

Friends, colleagues, those who are part of the quadrangle... I want to paint you a picture today. One that is not beautiful, but rather one that is mediocre, disappointing, and often deceiving. Four years ago, there was hope. There were dreams. There were ill-fated t-shirts. But those were just distractions from the train-wreck that was about to happen.

I do not need to remind you of the past four years, as all of you have likely shared in the riches of the Scott Frost era. Poor special teams, abysmal offensive-line play, often distracted defense, lack of offensive creativity, turnover prone quarterbacks, turnover prone running backs, turnover prone players who touch the football, and did I mention poor special teams?

The reality of the situation is that this year was likely Year 0 of the rebuild, but instead we have been fed story after story of a new era. A Scott Frost 2.0 in which he is the CEO and his coaches are the VPs in charge of execution. Not unlike the average corporate ouster, this too is a bunch of nonsense and as you will see today, even an improvement from 2021 is likely a mere distraction from reality. The Scott Frost experiment has been an abject failure.

Alas, I do believe this year is filled with opportunities. A manageable schedule, quite literally a turnover in coaching and skills positions, and a massive dose of incentive pushes this team into “at least sort of interesting” territory. The bottom line is that’s all one can hope for, and we are here to discuss just what level of interesting that entails.

II. Discovery

A. Evidence already presented

• We Still Think Nebraska Cornhuskers Football Can Win The Big Ten West In 2022
• So, Dead Read, How’s Nebraska Football Going?
• B1G 2022, Nebraska Potluck #1
• Huskers 2022 Schedule, Record Predictions
• What exactly are we doing here?
• Balloons Popping, Left and Right (an Offense Preview)
• Nebraska Football Defense/Special Teams Preview...and a Footless Goose?
• Men Ain’t S*** - A Look at the State of Nebraska Athletics

B. What can be learned from Pop Culture

Just because the reboot has a big name attached to it, gets a decent amount of fan hype, and looks like it should work on paper does not mean it will. Other parallels... This has a weak plot that is clinging to nostalgia and the hopes that millennial kids like me will equate Lebron to Michael Jordan in a way that Scott Frost is... Tom Osborne? I dunno. This movie - likely - sucked. I literally got through ten minutes of this movie before turning it off, not unlike how I’m going to feel on Saturday when Nebraska looks inept for the first half of the Dublin game. Nebraska 2022: The Space Jam Reboot of College Football. Get HYYYYYPED!

III. Schedule of Events

Look, this is about as manageable of a schedule as a team can get. If Frost can’t get to 7+ wins, that’s on him. The last four are fairly brutal, but you can’t convince me that six of the first 8 isn’t feasible. Also, I fully expect to have thrown a duplo through my TV by the end of September when this team decides not to follow through on potential.

But, I’m curious to watch Nebraska-Northwestern. Not excited, but curious. Nebraska-Oklahoma is a healthy dose of nostalgia and will be an interesting bellweather for both team’s reality for 2022. Or, it is likely the Texas-Notre Dame of football games in which it’s close, but because both teams are vastly overrated. Can Nebraska beat Iowa? Can Nebraska beat Illinois? I don’t know! But, it’s interesting. Again, it’s all I got.

IV. The Verdict

The writers have spoken, and while the variance is massive, it seems likely that Nebraska is on a collision course with 7-5, a miraculous Scott Frost job save, and another year of “well, I suppose we’re gonna keep doing this thing.”

I have not - admittedly - filled out my predictions because the person in charge told me I was supposed to and I hate doing what my superiors say I have to do, but doing a quick scan, I think I’m also landing on 7-5. My fear is that it’s going to be a 7-1 team that ends 7-5 and limps into a bowl with an interim coach. I don’t like this reality, but here we are.

V. Emotional Plea

Despite what is obviously an apathetic - perhaps cynical - defense of Nebraska Football going into 2022, I am cautiously optimistic that there are reasons to tune into - and maybe even root for - the Cornhuskers this year. The following points are coming from the cold, icy heart that I have left towards this team, but they are still from the heart:

• Casey Thompson is a fun story, and might be a decent QB. He had a rough go of it at Texas with injuries, and if his thumb - along with a new offensive system and QB coach in Mark Whipple - things might be looking up for him and Nebraska. He might not turn the ball over at the most inopportune times, which would be nice considering that has been a Nebraska QB trademark since... well, Taylor Martinez?
• Nebraska has really fun receivers! Decoldest Crawford is hurt, but is literally the best NIL story to come out of the NIL era. Let’s watch that video again:

• But he’s not the only fun thing. New WR coach Mickey Joseph brought in Trey Palmer from LSU, Marcus Washington from Texas, and Isaiah Garcia-Castenada from New Mexico State. Between them, Omar Manning, Alante Brown, and I guess... Brody Belt, there are some actual people to throw to.
• Rahmir Johnson is going to be a lot of fun to watch too! Duck R, Wide Back, “kinda like Deebo Samuel” I dunno. I like the guy. He’s a blast.
• Ochaun Matthis. I’m pretty sure he’s actually good, and it’s fun that he’s here. Other fun transfer to look out for? Tommi Hill. Also a transfer... Uh, there’s a theme here
• WE SIGNED THE FCS PUNTER OF THE YEAR - Brian Buschini. I hope he can punt to the right side of the field. Also signed a new kicker and kickoff specialist so new people everywhere.
• Lastly, I love Nebraska football, and while it has absolutely been a slog to watch the past decade, I will tune in on Saturday and root for the red and white team. I may not be excited for more of the same, but I will - at least - try and hope for the best. Football season is finally back, and I am grateful for that.