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Where We Be, What We Be Drinking: Week 1

Drinking one beer for every time Purdue decided not to Run The Dang Ball last night

Hey everyone, welcome to Where We Be, What We Be Drinking! I stayed up all night watching the Purdue-Penn State game instead of working on this, so you aren’t getting a cute intro paragraph today. It’s ok, I don’t think anyone reads this part, I can say whatever I want. Ass! Shit! Coach in waiting Brian Ferentz! See, nobody’s paying attention.


This is my first full season since moving back to Iowa City, so I’m officially a season ticket holder!! Please clap.

On Friday night me and some friends will be kicking off the year with a Golden Mile bar crawl in the spirit of The World’s End. Saturday morning I’ll be nursing my hangover at a tailgate with some Dale’s Pale Ale and bloody marys. I haven’t set foot in Kinnick Stadium for 3 years so I’m absolutely thrilled to be back home.


I will be in Los Angeles braving some mega heat wave we are supposed to get. Will be doing some daytime heatwave tailgating for future Big Ten juggernaut, USC. Drinking: Water. But in the evening I am going to see John Williams at the Hollywood Bowl so that’ll be cool.

Green Akers

Home in Detroitland once again, christening the full start of the new season with the first Black Cherry Vernors cocktail


I’ll be in Floyd, Virginia at yoga jam for the second day. A couple days of camping in the mountains and stretching, basically. I will be drinking water, kombucha, and probably some local craft beer that’s the only choice from the beer stand.


I’ll be in Cincinnati watching the game at a bar, drinking whatever I can get a good deal on, and pretending that I don’t have to work Friday morning.


I’ll be in Minneapolis Thursday night at Historic TCF Bank Stadium (fuck you, Huntington Bank) possibly drinking something other than Grain Belt because they’re not sold at the stadium anymore. Saturday I’ll be on my folks’ couch in Central Minnesota drinking all of the damn Grain Belts possible and watching anything that piques my interest.


it’s looking more and more like i’m going to be in............BLOOMINGTON, INDIANA!

i believe in illinois’ ability to be competitive in a road game for like the 3rd or 4th time since i graduated ten years ago

Thumpasaurus’ travel cooler includes:

  • Obscurity (Elburn, IL) Orange Pop Cultured: this shit tastes exactly like an orange tootsie pop
  • Ferndale Project Key Lime A La Mode: sour w/Graham cracker crust
  • Blake’s (armada MI) Tropicolada: what I didn’t slug down immediately after getting home halfway through game 1 of the illini season
  • St Ambrose XR Cyser: it’s an Apple pie mead
  • Roak Pink Lemonade Lager: eh I got it left over
  • A Tallboy Of Tecate: I forgot why I have this
  • Brew Detroit Cloud 19 NEIPA: my favorite of the many beers sold at Detroit City FC games; I’ve yet to have a bartender who gets me when I ask for a Hey Nineteen though
  • B Nektar Zombie Killer: just fuckin rules
  • B Nektar Cherry Chipotle Mead: in the event of a satisfying postgame
  • Naturdays Pink Lemonade Vodka: I don’t know I’ll probably see if I can trade it for a favor of some kind
  • Papa’s Pilar dark rum: this shit is for sipping, tastes like molasses
  • A flask half full of what is, at least to the best of my tasting/comparison abilities…redbreast 12 year cask strength? What the fuck, why did I flask EIGHT OUNCES OF THIS?
  • Jeppson’s Malort: anyone who asks is gonna find out


Home! Couch! Likely just some Gatorade plus all the frozen meals our wonderful friends have been dropping off. Maybe I’ll sneak in the beer my wife got me for this occasion, Due Date 4 from Bad Weather (a barrel-aged Flanders Red with cherries and dates). Maybe I’ll just sit here and weep silently.

Kind Of...

Greater Philadelphia area. Badgers aren’t until 8:00 EDT, so gonna need to pace myself. Probably a Daisy Cutter pre-kickoff. If things go well, might get a little snootier/higher ABV. If Mertz throws an early pick, who knows?


I have officially talked my wife into heading back to the homeland for the weekend. Meaning, I’ll be at the real Memorial Stadium Friday night in Bloomington, Indiana for opening night shenanigans. Drinking may take a backseat for the weekend given the incredible amount of heartburn I’ve had over the last couple weeks. If I do have a beer or two, it’ll be probably Indiana’s beer sponsor Coors-Light. I’ll be sure to be packing tums though.


I’ll be at my house in the Chicago suburbs, this time picking up some stuff from a local microbrewery.

RU in VA

I’ll be in Olney/Ellicott City Maryland with the bookends of my three kids doing a soccer tournament. It’s gonna suck.


My wife is taking the family to Cedar Point, leaving me two glorious, wonderful, kid free days where I promise not to drink too much.


I’ll be in sunny metro Denver, drinking iced tea and shitposting on the game threads for all I’m worth.


I have free tickets for the game in Ames. You can probably guess what I’ll be drinking.


I’ll be at my home, deciding whether I should miss the first hour of the game to take my stripe test or if I should take my stripe test the day I’m writing this on four hours of sleep instead. What could go wrong?

Brian Gillis

After spending last weekend is beautiful Lake Tahoe to celebrate week zero, I’m back home in Los Angeles for week one, where I’ll be trying my best to beat the heat. I’ve got a few trips to Michigan Stadium coming this season, but none during the non-conference schedule. So I’ll be at home on the couch enjoying the action.

And since I’m on the west coast, that action begins at 9:00 am. Nothing like waking up to College Gameday.

Dead Read

I will be in lovely Downtown Lincoln. I will be eating Mexican food, sitting in awed wonder at the latest feat of Husker self-sabotage. GBR.


I think I’m going to the game! I’m definitely going to volleyball afterwards, which should help me forget about the first poor decision. It does look like a lovely late summer day though, so it’s got that going for it.


I’ve got season tickets, but no consistent child care this season. So I’ll be home wrangling kids.

Jesse Collins

I’m going to be in Oatmeal, TX at Oatmeal fest. I might be home in time for the game, but that depends on how lit Oatmeal Fest is. There is BBQ promised but I’m not holding my breath.

Now let us know what you’re doing tomorrow down in the comments. Ready.....GO!