You ever have a boss tell you in a performance review that you’ve got to fulfill some stupid condition to keep your job? Something that’s maybe not an entirely unreasonable ask, but it’s just annoying and gets under your skin, because it’s a metric that you view as tangential (at best) to your real job? And so, rather than motivating you to excel, your boss has just pissed you off, and now it’s your mission to just make their lives miserable?

That, my friends, is the Ferentz Line. And, oh my, have the Ferentzi lived up to the challenge. Not by crossing it — but by making it clear that they had absolutely no intention of crossing it, and still winning the B1G West along the way.

This season is a Ferentzian masterpiece. We may not like it, but this is, without doubt, a perfect ending to the B1G West. We won’t have the West next year, and we’ll be down at least one Ferentz, so let’s just enjoy this mess for what it is.

Week Twelve:

We’re 3-11 against the line this week, and it’s the most boring 3-11 ever — the three highest-scoring squads in the conference are the only ones to top 25.

37 Ohio State
31 Michigan
27 Penn State
——————-
24 Maryland
24 Michigan State
24 Wisconsin
23 Northwestern
21 Indiana
17 Nebraska
15 Purdue
15 Iowa
13 Illinois
6 Rutgers
3 Minnesota

Season:

For the season, we’re 4-10 against the line. Barring something crazy in the final week (like a 48-point outburst from Purdue), this isn’t going to change. We are who we are.

A special note of shame to those teams who haven’t even reached 20 PPG: Nebraska, Iowa, and Michigan State.

38.3 (421/11) Michigan
36.7 (404/11) Penn State
33.6 (370/11) Ohio State
28.5 (313/11) Maryland
———————
22.9 (252/11) Purdue
22.8 (251/11) Illinois
22.5 (247/11) Rutgers
22.4 (246/11) Wisconsin
21.4 (235/11) Indiana
20.7 (228/11) Minnesota
20.7 (228/11) Northwestern
18.7 (206/11) Nebraska
18.5 (203/11) Iowa
17.2 (191/11) Michigan State

Record Against the Line:

Thank all that is holy that this is not the record that determines bowl eligibility.

10-1 Michigan
9-2 Penn State
7-4 Ohio State
6-5 Maryland
6-5 Minnesota
5-6 Rutgers
4-7 Illinois
4-7 Wisconsin
3-8 Indiana
3-8 Nebraska
3-8 Northwestern
3-8 Purdue
2-9 Michigan State
2-9 Iowa

Who's Safe?

To hit the 25 PPG mark, you need at least 300 points in a 12-game season, 325 in a 13-game season, 350 in a 14-game season, and 375 in a 15-game season.

Safe (15): Michigan (421), Penn State (404)
Safe (14): Ohio State (370)
Safe (12): Maryland (313)

Anyone else likely to get there in their final game? Uh…that would be a solid "No," Bob. Purdue needs 48 against Indiana, and Illinois needs 49 against Northwestern. Everyone else needs to put up more than 50 points to reach that magic number. Let’s just say that’s…unlikely.

Previous B1G West Winners

Well, folks, they did it. Before this season, only one team had the audacity to win the B1G West without crossing the Ferentz Line, and it wasn’t even Iowa — it was the 2018 Northwestern Wildcats. But Kirk and Brian were not to be out-Ferentzed by a Fitzgerald. They’ve clinched the B1G West at 18.5 PPG, and as long as they don’t put up 81 points against Nebraska on Black Friday, the 2023 Iowa Hawkeyes will take the crown as the Ferentziest Of Them All. Well done, Ferenzti.

2014 Wisconsin (450/12; 37.5 PPG)
2019 Wisconsin (429/12; 35.8 PPG)
2017 Wisconsin (418/12; 34.8 PPG)
2015 Iowa (404/12; 33.7 PPG)
2016 Wisconsin (342/12; 28.5 PPG)
2022 Purdue (341/12; 28.4 PPG)
2021 Iowa (308/12; 25.7 PPG)
2020 Northwestern (177/7; 25.3 PPG)
———————
2018 Northwestern (284/12; 23.7 PPG)
2023 Iowa (203/11; 18.5 PPG) <- one game to play