Explaining Baby Gronk, Drip King, Rizzed Up By Livvy, Baby Diggs, Air Quality, Michigan State

We broke the exclusive story earlier today, but your Off Tackle Empire I-Team can now confirm some more details surrounding the Baby Gronk LSU Tigers Rizzed Up By Livvy Drip King situation.

To the best of my understanding*, the elements of the story are as follows:

Baby Gronk, as you may remember, is former Penn State tight end Pat Freiermuth, who was frequently referred to as such because of his physical attributes being comparable to those of former Patriots and Buccaneers tight end Rob Gronkowski, with the exception of his age which is much lower (hence the “Baby” prefix). He is a candidate for a breakout year in his second season with the Pittsburgh Steelers.

Baby Diggs was the much lesser-used alias for former Maryland receiver DJ Moore, who reminded many of a less successful version of his predecessor, former Minnesota Viking and current Buffalo Bill Stefon Diggs. Moore was just traded from the Panthers to the Bears.

Baby Gronk vs Baby Diggs refers to the famous on-field rivalry between the two. Freiermuth might actually be more productive this season as a safety valve for former Pittsburgh Panther Kenny Pickett, while Moore will struggle to get the ball from Ohio State sprinter Justin Fields in Chicago.

Rizzed Up By Livvy refers to Livvy being affectionate towards Baby Gronk in a recent on campus visit to LSU Tigers. “Livvy” is of course shorthand for LIV Golf, the Saudi-state-backed professional golf tour that recently bought the PGA Tour. Livvy was involved with LSU and Baby Gronk because the Saudi State Fund is testing the waters for buying the NFL and the SEC.

Is Baby Gronk The New Drip King is a question that everyone is asking facetiously, because no, Baby Gronk can never take the place of Beard Lovie.

Photo by Thearon W. Henderson/Getty Images

Air Quality Index is Unhealthy to Hazardous in many parts of the northeastern United States because humanity has created a way of life that is not compatible with our long-term survival as a species.

Michigan State has potential as a football program due to the level of talent but it remains to be seen how they’ll address some serious flaws.

*this post is not satire because this is a full reflection of everything I know about the situation; what’s not cold hard fact is simply my best guess based on what i know.