Don’t Watch This; Watch That: Week 4 College Football Watch Guide is Taking 8 Hours for What We Will

Good afternoon. It’s time to tell you what games to watch.

Right now in Prof. MNW’s US History II class, we’re getting through the Gilded Age—a topic that, to be frank, I feel is slipping from relevance in the students’ eyes. We accept large corporations, we accept corporate power, we no longer live in tenements, and hey isn’t that great? Eyes glaze over, discussions of labor unions’ demands falls flat. Even some literal bomb-throwing at Haymarket Square is met with indifference.

Now, some of this is, surely, my fault: I’m in an exurban area, more farming- and nature-oriented, and preaching this to students who might not have a connection to a union—like I did with my dad, a high school teacher, or those people in UAW going on strike now.

Little glimmers of comprehension and connection to their surroundings do happen—”Oh yeah, who works in that paper mill?” or “Huh, there was a time when meatpacking was done by a largely white workforce?”—but I’m definitely going to be reassessing how I teach these lectures in the future.

And that’s because, particularly during the Gilded Age, we saw an explosion of labor organizing with the Knights of Labor, who after 1878 broadly endorsed the idea that the union should be for all* people—inclusive of women and African Americans, excluding only bankers, speculators, lawyers, liquor dealers, and gamblers. By 1886, almost a million workers belonged to the Knights—20% of the country’s workforce. Fighting for the eight-hour workday, they formed a prominent, vocal political force.
*Not Chinese-Americans, regrettably, who Knights members and other White laborers targeted in deadly pogroms like the Rock Springs Massacre in Wyoming, 1885.

One of the things I try to impress upon students is how ubiquitous—until the 1886 Haymarket Riot/Massacre—the Knights of Labor were. Zoom in on this great map from the University of Washington (Bee-One-Gee! Bee-One-Gee!) and see what’s up near you:

The idea that history—bomb-throwing, business-disrupting strikes—happened in our backyards is, particularly in today’s political climate, an interesting one to watch students wrestle with. They might have no connection to those movements and often tend to think of labor unions as what happens in factories, in Detroit, in cities away from them. Maps like these are fun jumping-off points for future exploration: what the hell were the Knights of Labor doing in Sleepy Eye? Ashland? Kewanee?

Demanding, you can bet, eight hours for work, eight hours for rest, and eight hours for what we will.

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Thursday Night
Don’t Watch This

College of New Jersey Lions at Franklin & Marshall Diplomats [6pm, CCtv]
UA-Pine Bluff Golden Lions at Alabama A&M Bulldogs [6:30pm, ESPNU]

{NFL} New York Football Giants at San Francisco 49ers [7:15pm, Amazon Prime]

{MLB} Baltimore Orioles at Cleveland Guardians [6:15pm, FOX Regional]
{MLB} New York Mets at Philadelphia Phillies [6:15pm, FOX Regional]

{Friendly} USWNT vs. South Africa [6:30pm, UNIVERSO, Peacock]
{CONCACAF} Haiti vs. Costa Rica [7pm, CBS Sports Golazo]
{NWSL} Angel City vs. Orlando Pride [9pm, CBSSN]

Watch That

Georgia State Panthers at Coastal Carolina Chanticleers

6:30pm | ESPN | CCU -6.5 | O/U 62

Apparently some sort of non-COVID plague has hit our house—super-fun, because when I get home around 6, my mother-in-law will be over and my wife will be PISSED!

Odds that I’m in the basement watching Georgia State-Coastal Carolina by 7pm? Slim. But if there’s a chance, it’ll keep me going...

Friday Night
Don’t Watch This

Brown Bears at Harvard Crimson [6pm, ESPN+]
#5 Hardin-Simmons at Endicott [6pm, Stretch]
NC State Wolfpack (-9.5, O/U 47.5) at Virginia Cavaliers [6:30pm, ESPN]
Boise State Broncos (-7, O/U 45) at San Diego State Aztecs [9:30pm, CBSSN]

{CFL} Saskatchewan Roughriders at Ottawa REDBLACKS [6pm, CBSSN]

{B1GVB} Michigan State at Michigan [7pm, BTN]
{B1GVB} Ohio State at Nebraska [9pm, BTN]

{WWC Qualifying} Jamaica vs. Canada [7pm, CBS Sports Golazo]
{Liga MX} Atletico San Luis vs. Mazatlan [8pm, TUDN]
{Liga MX} Bravos vs. Atlas [8:06pm, FOX Deportes]
{Liga MX} Puebla vs. Pumas [10pm, TUDXN]

Watch That

wisconsin badgers at Purdue Boilermakers

6pm | FS1 | wisc -5.5 | O/U 53.5

Air Force Falcons at San Jose State Spartans

9:30pm | FS1 | AFA -4.5 | O/U 46.5

A game I’m legitimately curious about, wisconsin-Purdue: will the badgers actually go back to what works and just run the ball down Purdue’s throat? Is Luke Fickell willing to piss away a million-game winning streak just for his damn pride?

I wouldn’t touch Boise-San Diego State with a ten-foot pole, but I can’t promise Air Force-SJSU will be any better, I suppose. The Falcons already treated us to a 13-3 win over a moribund Sam Houston State team. Must be a great ratings night for CBSSN, though, with a doubleheader of Roughriders-REDBLACKS and Broncos-Aztecs. Yeesh.

Please do not tell me the difference in the comments, I genuinely do not care.

Saturday Morning
Don’t Watch This

Rutgers Scarlet Knights at #2 Michigan Wolverines (-24, O/U 44) [11am, BTN]
#4 Florida State Seminoles (-2.5, O/U 55) at Clemson Tigers [11am, ABC]
#16 Oklahoma Sooners (-14.5, O/U 57.5) at Cincinnati Bearcats [11am, FOX]
Army Black Knights at Syracuse Orange (-13.5, O/U 52) [11am, ACCN]
Auburn Tigers at Texas A&M Aggies (-7.5, O/U 51.5) [11am, ESPN]
Kentucky Wildcats (-13.5, O/U 50.5) at Vanderbilt Commodores [11am, SECN]
Virginia Tech Hokies at Marshall Thundering Herd (-5, O/U 41) [11am, ESPN2]
Western Michigan Broncos at Toledo Rockets (-21, O/U 54) [12:30pm, ESPN+]

{Serie A} Sassuolo vs. Juventus [11am, Paramount+]
{Bundesliga} Werder Bremen vs. Koln [11:30am, ESPN+]
{EPL} Brentford vs. Everton [11:30am, NBC]
{La Liga} Barcelona vs. Celta de Vigo [11:30am, ESPN+]

Watch That

Western Kentucky Hilltoppers at Troy Trojans

11am | ESPNU | Troy -3.5 | O/U 58

SMU Cocaine Ponies at TCU Horned Frogs

11am | FS1 | TCU -6.5 | O/U 63.5 | BATTLE FOR THE IRON SKILLET

A really light morning slate, as it’s still apparently too hot to play football in the daytime some places. That’s just fine, because the morning coffee will hit and the Battle for the Iron Skillet goes DOWN. We’ve got two unlikeable assholes coaching here in Rhett Lashlee and Sonny Dykes, and these two teams have given us a series the last three years:

• 2019: SMU, 41-38
• 2021: TCU, 42-34
• 2022: TCU, 42-34

Take the over. The spread’s about right. Let’s get weird.

Saturday Afternoon
Don’t Watch This

Georgia Southern Eagles (-6.5, O/U 61) at Balls Tate Robotbirds [1pm, ESPN+]
#19 Colorado Buffaloes at #10 Oregon Ducks (-21, O/U 70.5) [2:30pm, ABC]
#22 UCLA Bruins at #11 Utah Utes (-4.5, O/U 52.5) [2:30pm, FOX]
#15 Ole Miss Rebels at #13 Alabama Crimson Tide (-6.5 O/U 55.5) [2:30pm, CBS]
#18 Duke Blue Devils (-21.5, O/U 45) at UConn Huskies [2:30pm, CBSSN]
#20 Miami Hurricanes (-23.5, O/U 48.5) at Temple Owls [2:30pm, ESPN2]
Florida Atlantic Owls at Illinois Fighting Illini (-15.5, O/U 45.5) [2:30pm, BTN]
Maryland Terrapins (-7.5, O/U 52) at Michigan State Spartans [2:30pm, NBC]
Louisiana Tech Bulldogs at Nebraska Cornhuskers (-21, O/U 47) [2:30pm, BTN]
Boston College Eagles at Louisville Cardinals (-13.5, O/U 54) [2:30pm, ACCN]
Texas Tech Red Raiders (-6, O/U 55) at West Virginia Mountaineers [2:30pm, ESPN+]
A&M-Commerce Lions at Old Dominion Monarchs [2:30pm, ESPN+]
Ohio Bobcats (-13, O/U 44.5) at Bowling Green Falcons [2:30pm, ESPN+]
Delaware State Hornets at Miami Hydroxide Redhawks [2:30pm, ESPN+]
UTSA Roadrunners at #23 Tennessee Volunteers (-21, O/U 59) [3pm, SECN]
Oklahoma State Cowboys at Iowa State Cyclones (-3.5, O/U 36) [3pm, FS1]
Rice Owls (-2.5, O/U 58) at South Florida Brahman Bulls [3pm, ESPNU]
Eastern Michigan EMUs at Jacksonville State Hokeamanias (-6, O/U 52.5) [4pm, ESPN+]
Central Michigan Chippewas at South Alabama Jaguars (-15, O/U 48.5) [4pm, ESPN+]

{Eredivisie} Almere City vs. PSV [1pm, ESPN+]
{Bund. 2} St. Pauli vs. Schalke 04 [1:30pm, ESPN+]
{Serie A} Lazio vs. Monza [1:45pm, Paramount+]
{EPL} Burnley vs. Manchester United [2pm, Peacock]
{La Liga} Almeria vs. Valencia [2pm, ESPN+]
{CPL} Vancouver FC vs. HFX Wanderers [3pm, Fox Soccer Plus]

Watch That

BYU Cougars at Kansas Jayhawks

2:30pm | ESPN | Kansas -8.5 | O/U 54.5

New Mexico Lobos at UMass Minutemen

2:30pm | ESPN+ | UMass -3.5 | O/U 49

Couple of good Big XII-Big Ten matchups this afternoon, but (1) Colorado’s not for real—though Shadeur Sanders is a lot of fun—and (2) UCLA-Utah will be a rock fight.

Instead, let’s hit the random number generator that’s Kansas, which first tried its damnedest to give the game away to Nevada last week. They get a team I know next to nothing about in BYU—I expect cheap shots and limited defense? Jalon Daniels is fun and you don’t have to listen to FOX read off their instructions to nauseatingly calling Deion Sanders “Coach Prime” the whole game.

Saturday Evening
Don’t Watch This

Gardner-Webb Runnin’ Bulldogs at East Carolina Pirates [5pm, ESPN+]
FIU Sunblazers (+10, O/U 54.5) [5:30pm, ESPN+]
Arkansas Razorbacks at #12 LSU Tigers (-17.5, O/U 55) [6pm, ESPN]
Charlotte 49ers at #25 Florida Gators (-28, O/U 49) [6pm, SECN+]
Sam Houston Bearkats at Houston Cougars (-12, O/U 38) [6pm, ESPN+]
Colorado State Rams at Middle Tennessee Blue Raiders (-3, O/U 52) [6pm, ESPN+]
Arizona Wildcats (-12, O/U 60) at Stanford Cardinal [6pm, Pac-12]
Nicholls Colonels at Tulane Green Wave [6pm, ESPN+]
Nevada Wolf Pack at Texas State Bobcats (-17, O/U 59) [6pm, ESPN+]
Southern Miss Golden Iggles (-7, O/U 49) at Arkansas State Red Wolves [6pm, ESPN+]
UAB Blazers at #1 Georgia Bulldogs (-42, O/U 54) [6:30pm, ESPN2]
#3 Texas Longhorns (-15, O/U 51.5) at Baylor Bears [6:30pm, ABC]
#6 Ohio State Buckeyes (-3, O/U 55.5) at #9 Notre Dame Fighting Irish [6:30pm, NBC]
#24 Iowa Hawkeyes at #7 Penn State Nittany Lions (-15, O/U 40) [6:30pm, CBS]
Minnesota Golden Gophers (-11.5, O/U 38) at Northwestern Wildcats [6:30pm, BTN]
Akron Zips at Indiana Hoosiers (-17, O/U 46) [6:30pm, BTN]
Memphis Tigers at Missouri Tigers (-6, O/U 51.5) [6:30pm, ESPNU]
Mississippi State Bulldogs at South Carolina Gamecocks (-6.5, O/U 48) [6:30pm, SECN]
Buffalo Bulls at Louisiana Ragin’ Cajuns (-9.5, O/U 58.5) [6:30pm, ESPN+]
#17 North Carolina Tar Heels (-7.5, O/U 50) at Pittsburgh Panthers [7pm, ACCN]
UCF Citronauts at Kansas State Wildcats (-4.5, O/U 52) [7pm, FS1]
James Madison Dukes (-6.5, O/U 52.5) at Utah State Aggies [7pm, MWN]
#3 Montana State Bobcats at #8 Weber State Wildcats [7pm, ESPN+]

{MLS} Lots of it on AppleTV.

Watch That

#14 Oregon State Beavers at #21 Washington State Cougars

6pm | FOX | Oregon State -3 | O/U 58.5

Appalachian State Mountaineers at Wyoming Cowboys

6pm | CBSSN | Wyoming -3 | O/U 42.5

Shout-out to a couple awful totals this weekend:

• Oklahoma State +3.5 at Iowa State, with an O/U of 36,
• Sam Houston getting 12 at Houston with an O/U still at just 38 (that’s a 25-13 final score), and
• Minnesota giving 11.5 at Northwestern with a similar O/U of 38.

There is gonna be some ASSY football.

There are two good games on, though. Two games that will offer you points, passion, and actually-tolerable storylines. Those two games are Oregon State-Washington State—the Pac-12 Championship!—and Appalachian-Wyoming.

Do not be fooled into thinking “Well, they’re two of the best 10 teams in the country, I’ve gotta watch”: Hitler and Stalin were two of the most powerful men in the world in 1939, but you did not, in fact, gotta hand it to them.

It’s late and I’m drunk...
Don’t Watch This

Eastern Washington Eagles at UC Davis Aggies [9pm, ESPN+]
#5 USC Trojans (-34.5, O/U 62) at Arizona State Sun Devils [9:30pm, FOX]
California Golden Bears at #8 Washington Huskies (-20.5, O/U 59.5) [9:30pm, ESPN]
Kent State Golden Flashes at Fresno State Bulldogs (-27.5, O/U 49) [9:30pm, CBSSN]

Watch That

UNLV Rebels at UTEP Miners

8pm | ESPN+ | UNLV -2.5 | O/U 50.5

New Mexico State Aggies at Hawai’i Rainbow Warriors

10:59pm | Team1Sports | Hawai’i -3 | O/U 57.5

I mean, this is perfection. Beat-em-downs on the major channels? No matter at all. Fire up that phone and get to gettin’ aroused by some run-and-shoot on Team1Sports. Can Jerry Kill slow them down? Can the Aggies ground-and-pound a suspect ‘Bows defense?

I plan to be so drunk I neither know nor care, but I sure as hell watch.

Eight hours for what we will begins...now.

Hell, take 10.

Hell, take a weekend. You’ve earned it.